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It's pretty pointless for me to pretend, at this late date when my goal is to die in air-conditioned comfort in a house big enough to hold all my books, that I'm some kind of anti-consumerist firebrand. I won't even act like I'm immune to the allure of convenience packaging -- I am self-employed and single, after all. There's not even anything inherently wrong with a company trying to sell you as little of its product as possible for as much money as possible; that's the name of the capitalist game, and it takes something pretty outrageous to even be worth responding to.

Having said all that, you've got to be shitting me.

What this is, is a cardboard package containing enough herbs and spices -- in portions of less than one teaspoon -- to make a single meal that uses those herbs and spices. And it retails for two dollars, or roughly the same amount of money you would spend on a container of the same spices that has twenty times as much.

I predict it will be a huge seller.

Comments

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johnnylemonhead
Jul. 7th, 2010 03:40 am (UTC)
Who knows why, but that icon coupled with this post is cracking me the fuck up. Thank you for the laughs, kind sir.
drpaisley
Jul. 7th, 2010 04:41 am (UTC)
But it's got a collectible recipe card!

And yeah, it'll sell like crazy.
calamityjon
Jul. 7th, 2010 04:27 pm (UTC)
I have a sudden vision of a wonderful new hobby ...
I understand that the Coq Au Vin 1968 Rookie card goes for upwards of two hundred bucks on eBay.
drpaisley
Jul. 8th, 2010 02:59 am (UTC)
Re: I have a sudden vision of a wonderful new hobby ...
But only if it's signed (insert obligatory remark about chicken scratchings here.
thaitea
Jul. 7th, 2010 05:44 am (UTC)
Most of the fun of cooking for me is improvised spice choices and haphazardly eyeballing the amounts.
eatsoylentgreen
Jul. 7th, 2010 11:59 am (UTC)
If they gave me the choice between 3 ounces of one spice, versus .5 ounces of 6 spices, I'd definitely choose the latter, price being equal. Spices get old and lose their flavor.
calamityjon
Jul. 7th, 2010 04:16 pm (UTC)
Price is not equal.
(Deleted comment)
calamityjon
Jul. 7th, 2010 04:26 pm (UTC)
Let's look at the flowchart here:

1. Leonard says "Here is a thing, the price is not equal."
2. You say "I'd buy that, price being equal"
3. I say "The price isn't equal."
4. You say, amazingly, "I KNOW that!"

Well. Thanks.
(Deleted comment)
calamityjon
Jul. 7th, 2010 05:26 pm (UTC)
Nope, you really did qualify it by saying "price being equal". I looked. It's in words and everything.
(Deleted comment)
calamityjon
Jul. 7th, 2010 05:33 pm (UTC)
I'm sure that's why.
blue_straggler
Jul. 7th, 2010 01:48 pm (UTC)
I think this will not sell because it falls into the hazy middle area of cooking between "I like cooking and don't want McCormick to lock me into a particular recipe path" and "I hate cooking and this is STILL too much work." It also appeals to neither money-savers nor pay-for-quality shoppers.

I vote that it fails.
perich
Jul. 7th, 2010 01:54 pm (UTC)
Get back to me in six months; I'll let you know how it did.
calamityjon
Jul. 7th, 2010 04:20 pm (UTC)
I don't quite understand why the spices are separated. Do they not get along? Are they stored at different levels of dehydration? Is there garlic and anti-garlic, and if the two come into contact do they explode?

One time I heard a thirteen year-old kid call into Loveline and he'd heard that if you have sex with two women at the same time and they touch their things together at the same time that that's how AIDS happens. Is that what's going on? If these spices touch do we get AIDS?

tawdryjones
Jul. 7th, 2010 05:08 pm (UTC)
It's like dyeing your hair. If you mix the goop BEFORE you're ready to put it on your head, a black hole appears.

I'm guessing if you mix the spices ahead of time, your shrimp and pasta primavera will taste like chicken parmigiana and then where will you be?
calamityjon
Jul. 7th, 2010 05:09 pm (UTC)
Ah, the Bermuda Triangle. I take your point!
bassman42
Jul. 12th, 2010 03:46 pm (UTC)
With the number of people who voted for W and believe the Gulf Oil Disaster is Obama's fault, it should sell millions of units.Yes, Virginia, there are morons.
lucifrix
Jul. 13th, 2010 07:03 pm (UTC)
You've never watched "Semi-Homemade," have you? We'll be seeing this product on there someday (though, of course, with the brand name covered with tape).
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Leonard Pierce is a freelance writer wandering around Texas with no sleep or sense of direction. If you give him money he will write something for you. If you are nice to him he may come to your house and get drunk.

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