October 30th, 2003

flavored with age

One more day to Halloween, Halloween, Halloween/one more day to Halloween - Silver Shamrock!

Yes, Halloween is one day away, and I couldn't be more excited about my BIG PARTY!

Unfortunately, when I went to rent cheesy 1980s horror movies, I suffered a major setback in the party planning: the video store didn't have two of the three movies I wanted to rent starring my favorite actor of all time, Tom Atkins!

Longtime readers of this site are more than familiar with my mighty love for Tom Atkins, the grizzled, mustachioed character actor who almost inevitably plays a gruff, cynical detective or doctor with "Mc" in his name. You might also be aware that he starred in three of the greatest cheesy horror movies of the entire decade of the Eighties: Creepshow, Halloween III: Season of the Witch, and Night of the Creeps. He is the living embodiment of all I love about cheesy 1980s horror movies. I even wrote about him in the party plan that I drafted for guests to read; I had a whole drinking game built around Tom Atkins, which will now never get off the ground because of the failure of my local video chain store.

But damn it, I will not be daunted. I will share the glories of Tom Atkins with my friends. Tell me, friends: what Tom Atkins performance resonates the most with you?


Poll #198451 The Atkins Diet

What is Tom Atkins' greatest screen role?

Det. Ray "Thrill Me" Cameron in Night of the Creeps
0(0.0%)
Dr. Daniel "Dan" Challis in Halloween III: Season of the Witch
1(14.3%)
Lt. (later Cdr.) Alex Diehl in The Rockford Files
0(0.0%)
Lt. Tom Sullivan in Serpico
0(0.0%)
Nick "No Relation to Frank" Castle in John Carpenter's The Fog
1(14.3%)
Sgt. Krebs (who knows karate) in The Ninth Configuration
0(0.0%)
Rehme in John Carpenter's Escape from New York
1(14.3%)
The villainous Michael Hunsaker in Lethal Weapon
0(0.0%)
Frank McRae, the maniac cop, in Maniac Cop
0(0.0%)
the sinister Dr. Caleb Menck in Bob Roberts
0(0.0%)
Det. McCleary, his 843rd consecutive performance as a cop with "Mc" in his name, in Bruiser
0(0.0%)
his uncredited turn as Billy's dad in Creepshow
0(0.0%)
some other fantastic Tom Atkins performance you have not mentioned but which I will detail in the comments section
0(0.0%)
I will go to my grave not knowing why you are so fucking obsessed with Tom Atkins
2(28.6%)
Tom Atkins is so great in all his roles, it is impossible to choose which one is the greatest
2(28.6%)
flavored with age

She got a tattooed tit that say Number 13

Hey, speaking of cheesy horror movies, I watched Bride of Chucky last night. You know what would have made that movie better? If it had consisted of nothing but Jennifer Tilly walking around in front of the camera wearing that get-up from the beginning of the movie. If it had just been two hours of that, plus she would occasionally bend over, it would be the perfect movie. Also maybe if she made out with Uma Thurman for like half an hour.

YES YOU HEARD ME I HAVE A BIG BONE ON FOR JENNIFER TILLY. I know she's 'Hollywood fat' and she's 75 years old. I DO NOT CARE BECAUSE I LOVE HER.