July 28th, 2004

flavored with age

And now, Boredom Inc. presents: THINGS SCRAWLED IN MY NOTEBOOK OVER THE LAST FEW DAYS

FK chapter: the internet and the death of the rugged individualist

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Big-Ass Hard-On

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The National Broiler Council says: "Everybody just loves chicken!"

"Fuck you, National Broiler Council," counters the American Milk Solids Board. "The only way people love chicken is when it's coated in milk solids."

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Vinegar, pepper, butter. With these three ingredients is a revolution made.

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Why does my iPod go skippy? Why won't my e-mail get clear? Why is the sky blue?

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"The Contender", a new Mark-Burnette-produced reality show, will highligh the progress of a young boxer. He will be coached by Sugar Ray Leonard and Sylvester Stallone.

Can anyone spot the flaw in this casting?

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I do not like me no Henry Miller.

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I am a scientist! Stop hitting me!

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I want to start an organization called Borders without Doctors. Its purpose would be the creation and enforcement of arbitrary boundaries between randomly selected geographical areas, where no medical care would be available.

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Obama = the Cuomo of the 2004 DNC. It's a good thing he talked today instead of Thursday, because otherwise, everyone would be wondering why Kerry is the candidate. Let's just hope for a better outcome. (Remember Jesse Jackson: accused of trying to steal Mondale's thunder, Jesse responds "Mr. Mondale has no intention of bringing any thunder to this convention."

P.S. Hilary and Chelsea, drinking champagne together in the balcony, insanely hot.
flavored with age

Stinko

I made an absolutely kick ass vat full of homemade whipped garlic mashed potatoes. I followed the recipe in "Joy of Cooking", which I guarantee you will get you perfect mash taters every time, and I added a bunch of roasted garlic. It was delicious.

On the downside, they were so loaded with garlic and onions that my breath is killing birds as far away as the North Avenue Pier.