November 9th, 2006

flavored with age

Clownin'

Town Hall finally catches up to the elections, and despite the claims of a certain oblivious Minnesota shopper, there's a lotta rancor. Most of them (like Rich Galen) are pushing the "Democrats didn't win, Republicans lost" angle, and there's also plenty of denial that this had anything to do with the Iraq War, despite bountiful evidence that it did. Herman Cain* claims that "compassionate conservativism" -- defined as a government that thinks the less fortunate should be helped, as long as it's someone other than the government who helps them -- was the big loser in this election. I failed to see much compassion or conservativism from the 109th, but Herman is all bitter that now Bush will probably push through his amnesty for illegal aliens. Failing to lock up and deport impoverished immigrants, he says, is neither compassionate nor conservative. (Marvin Olasky, who coined the term 'compassionate conservative', agrees, lamenting the loss of Rick Santorum, a.k.a. Our Churchill, whose clear-eyed vision of unrelenting war against Eurasia has now been muddled by a foolishly short-sighted electorate.)

Big Bill Buckley likewise pushes the "Democrats have no ideas, they just won because they aren't Republicans" schtick while misusing the word 'categorical'; no less august a personage than Tony Blankley provides Lileks with a little of that rancor he couldn't seem to find by bitching about the "liberal, anti-war, activist, Internet-driven anti-Bush voters" who will now force "highly aggressive oversight hearings (and perhaps radical health care reform and tax-the-rich legislation)" down our throats. Cal Thomas has lots of rancor to spare, deciding that the best tactic is to start preemptively bashing the Democrats before they're even in office about all the ways he knows they're going to fuck up, and Lileks' best friend forever Hugh Hewitt blames the whole fiasco on John McCain.

On an ordinary day, the Most Batshit Column Award would go to Larry Elder*, who is still flogging the John Kerry Iraq thing. But today is not an ordinary day. No, today is a special day. Today is the first day in a long time that the harridan from New Canaan has woken up to a Democratic majority in Congress.

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*: I think there are 250 black Republicans in America, and every one of them is employed writing columns for Town Hall.
aging gracelessly

Hey, he was good in...uh...

A copy of the latest AARP magazine just arrived, with a big cover photo of Robin Williams, dressed as Lance Armstrong...but riding a tricycle! Uh HAW HAW HAW, ohHO HO HO!

The headline is "KEEPING A CHILDLIKE SENSE OF WONDER", which I guess means "becoming a national laughingstock because you're so unfunny and can't move one centimeter beyond your decades-old glory days when America was briefly amused at your ability to shovel bucketloads of coke up your face and do funny voices".

Anytime people talk about the superior wisdom of children, or the importance of maintaining a childlike innocence or sense of wonder, I know that some Grade A premium-cut bullshit is about to be plated at my table. If Robin Williams is involved, you might as well ask for the check right away.