March 19th, 2007

stella stella can't you hear me yella

Whorin'

Today's Ludic Log: South By Southwest Bingo!

Shout-outs for this entry: the center square joke is cribbed from solipsiae, and the B-6 joke is c-in-a-circle Whitney Pastorek. Also, if I were calamityjon -- which is to say, if I (a) was funny and (b) could draw something that didn't look like the product of a stroke-victim octopus with hooks at the ends of its tentacles -- I would have drawn this. But I'm not, so you have to read it. Tough beanies.
what have i done?

Ess ex Ess Double You

As you know, I have just returned from the big annual music-industry wank-cipher known as South By Southwest, in the lovely town of Austin. This is not the first year I've gone, but it is the first year I've covered it as a working journalist, as it were, so a lot of my observations must be spared for the paying audience. You're crushed, I know. Still and all, I did keep a running account of where I was and what I was doing. Collapse )
banana

Why does the banana icon mean "poll"?

What's the significance? I DON'T KNOW!

Poll #949507 Polla XIX

If you have written any of the following, which represents your WORST writing?

fiction
7(10.0%)
non-fiction
1(1.4%)
poetry
24(34.3%)
song lyrics
7(10.0%)
journalism
2(2.9%)
opinion
3(4.3%)
humor
4(5.7%)
criticism
6(8.6%)
drama (plays/screenplays)
2(2.9%)
diary/confessional writing/autobiography
6(8.6%)
informational/technical
2(2.9%)
other (see Comments)
0(0.0%)
I have never done any of these types of writing
0(0.0%)
I am awful at all of these
4(5.7%)
I am awesome at all of these
2(2.9%)

What did you do for St. Patrick's Day?

wore something green
4(6.6%)
wore something orange
0(0.0%)
alleged a questionable Irishness
2(3.3%)
drew an obnoxious amount of attention to my non-Irishness
4(6.6%)
got loaded
5(8.2%)
ate something involving a boiled potato
9(14.8%)
detonated an Englishman
3(4.9%)
went to a parade/was not allowed to go to a parade
1(1.6%)
drove snakes out of my area
7(11.5%)
worshipped God
0(0.0%)

Let a smile be your...

...umbrella
1(1.5%)
...bumbershoot
9(13.2%)
...parasol
3(4.4%)
...defense mechanism
16(23.5%)
...sole reason for existence
2(2.9%)
...means of baring your teeth to fend off predators
26(38.2%)
...really stupid excuse for a poll question
11(16.2%)

How many television shows -- broadcast, not on DVD -- do you watch in a week?

none
9(12.7%)
1-3
25(35.2%)
4-6
21(29.6%)
7-9
5(7.0%)
10-12
7(9.9%)
13-15
1(1.4%)
15-19
1(1.4%)
20 or more
1(1.4%)
ha ha, 20 or more? what?
1(1.4%)
does porn count as a television show?
0(0.0%)

Hit me with your unanswered questions, and they will be answered.