June 18th, 2007

on a steel horse I ride

Weakened update

I went hiking on Saturday (the Homestead Trail outside of Austin). It was pretty enjoyable, with a challenging (well, challenging if you are a fat old man) creek crossing and some nice scenic spots, but I was once again reminded that summer + Texas = really hot and swarming with insects. I will count myself very lucky if I manage to get through the year without contracting malaria, West Nile virus, or African trypanosomiasis.

Freelancing, after a long while of kicking my ass, has dried up a bit, which means that soon enough I'll have to return to sending out unsolicited pitch letters, which is the writing equivalent of doing cold calls. I hate it worse than anything, but I gots to keep that doremus flowing. On the other hand, this does give me free time to do the things I want to do, like work on personal projects, watch movies, read, and sleep for many many hours at a time. Sometimes I worry that even when my schedule is freed up I don't have enough time to do the things I want to do, but this has to be one of the more arcane, not to mention selfish and pathetic, problems in the history of human fretting. "Get fewer needs", would be George Carlin's useful advice here.

Oh, also, the verdict from here on LJ phone-post autotranscribing? Guilty of lacking subtlety, failure to master punctuation, and inability to properly transcribe pauses and emphases in spoken text. Also guilty of being nifty, though, so let's call it time served.

Anyway, I'm off to work now, looking pretty fly I must say albeit with the worst haircut I've had in a while. Who will notice? Who will care? No one, dear LiveJournal. No one at all.

BTW, amount raised over the weekend to send me to CPAC so you can all benefit from the leff-filled experience? Zero dollars and no goddamn sense. Get on the stick, people! The rest of my friends list is making you look bad!

Send me to CPAC! It's good for you!




banana

Bananapollmondaytime

By the way, did you know that there are now almost as many mercenaries private military contractors in Iraq as there are government troops? Super comforting!

Poll #1005240 Monday Poland

What crazy fake science do you hope the Bush administration stops funding next?

so-called "evolution"
0(0.0%)
this "global warming" bullshit
2(3.8%)
"birth control", which is just a bunch of crap
5(9.6%)
"stem cell research", like there even is such a thing
2(3.8%)
I think they should stop funding science altogether
12(23.1%)
anything that involves words not found in the Bible
19(36.5%)
any research that involves scientists from the brown countries
12(23.1%)

Aside from Poland, what other members of the Coalition of the Willing have you forgotten?

the United States
2(3.8%)
the United Kingdom
0(0.0%)
Australia
0(0.0%)
Denmark
0(0.0%)
South Korea
0(0.0%)
Romania
0(0.0%)
Georgia
0(0.0%)
El Salvador
1(1.9%)
the Czech Republic
0(0.0%)
Azerbaijan
2(3.8%)
Latvia
1(1.9%)
Mongolia
0(0.0%)
Albania
1(1.9%)
Lithuania
0(0.0%)
Armenia
0(0.0%)
Bosnia & Herzegovina
0(0.0%)
Estonia
1(1.9%)
Macedonia
0(0.0%)
Kazakhstan
0(0.0%)
Moldova
5(9.6%)
Bulgaria
0(0.0%)

With the recent success of the "zombie romantic comedy", or "zomromcom", genre of film, what's next for Hollywood?

British sadomasochism drama (pomdomdram)
4(7.5%)
"Pink Panther" revivals (Lombombcom)
2(3.8%)
kitchy art theft comedy-thrillers (Frahmglomcom)
11(20.8%)
unsuccessful teenage pregnancy flicks (prommombomb)
16(30.2%)
romances set in the world of competitive eating (nomnomrom)
20(37.7%)

With which of the following forbidden words (as defined by George Carlin) do you most identify?

fuck
20(37.7%)
shit
5(9.4%)
piss
1(1.9%)
cunt
3(5.7%)
cocksucker
6(11.3%)
motherfucker
9(17.0%)
tits
3(5.7%)
fart
2(3.8%)
turd
0(0.0%)
twat
4(7.5%)

If you had an amusing butler, what would be his name and primary distinguishing characteristic?

god bless the internet

Sossitch

I never do link posts, because other people are better at it. But since the Ludic Log is off gathering dust over the mantle, here's some stuff I would otherwise have put up on Sundays, back when I did links on Sundays. Remember that? Remember when I was funny and prolific? Me neither.

Antioch College is dead. Now the conservatives will have to find a new crazy hippie college to pick on; I nominate Evergreen.

That's one more ivory backscratcher for Old Man Burns. In other, totally unrelated news, America still 'can't afford' universal health care or education.

Now that's eatin' good in the neighborhood. Drowsiness and vomiting are my reactions to eating there too, and free food would only make it worse.

By the way, I think it's hilarious pathetic fascinating that some of you get performance anxiety with the fill-in-the-blank poll questions. Because, I mean, you don't have to do them! You're not being graded or nothin'. You guys! You crazy knuckleheads!