June 29th, 2007


Our whiteness, our precious precious whiteness

Via my boy Bradrocket at S,N! comes this hilarious article in the Post about how heartland dimwits, spurred on by right-wing bloggers and blowhard talk show hosts (who surely have their best interests in mind), helped kill the immigration reform bill. Why? Because they're deathly afraid of brown people. And not the ones who saw your head off and fly planes into your trade centers, but the ones who empty your trash and clean your toilets. It's really amazing, and it starts out with a great anecdote about one of the terrified flowers of white womanhood standing up to this vicious horde of Others:

Stephanie Usrey strode up to her local Wal-Mart store the other morning with the steely look of a boxer about to step into the ring. A stay-at-home mother of two, Usrey has dreaded shopping at this particular branch ever since a Friday afternoon about five years ago, when she said she suddenly noticed she was the only non-Latino customer.

OH NOES! Can you imagine the horror? Being forced, while visiting your local Wal-Mart, to contend with these vast waves of people who are not exactly like you? But it gets worse!

"That was the first time I looked around and said, 'Man, I didn't realize how many Mexicans there were here,' " Usrey, 39, recalled. "And they don't seem to feel any discomfort when they're, like, six inches from your face and talking to each other in their language, either.

Can you imagine, dear reader? Can you imagine? These filthy migrants, speaking their gibberish right in front of a white woman without a scrap of the deference or shame they should have felt when in the presence of their social betters! There is a word for that sort of behavior, and that word is "uppity". These Latinos need to know their place, and their place is not at a white peoples' Wal-Mart, speaking Spanish at each other, unless it's during lunch break when they're not mopping the floor.

I just felt very encroached upon...

You know who I bet felt very encroached upon? American Indians.

It was like an instant feeling of 'I'm in the minority, and if we don't get control over this, pretty soon all of America will be outnumbered.'"

Welcome to the whole rest of the fucking world, Stephanie Usrey! Why, did you know there are whole countries where English-speaking whites are in the minority? And yet, through the grace and power of our clearly omnipotent Savior, we prevail. One thing is for certain: at all costs, total white hegemony of every aspect of our culture must be preserved. We must never, ever allow other people to make us feel the way we have made them feel for hundreds of years.

The article goes on to enumerate the myriad other sins of the Latin horde (the throw toilet paper in the trash! they spray-paint graffiti! they wear shorts in the pool! they took chicken-plant jobs away from our coloreds! their stores have Spanish words in the name!). It's really a beaut, Len Bob says check it out.