November 6th, 2007

um...

Sometimes I feel like you don't know me at all, Google Ads

Usually, the only e-mails I leave in my inbox are those concerning freelance assignments I haven't yet completed. Everything else I file after reading it.

So, as a result of this, gMail has been showing me this ad at the top of the page that says "Are you serious about writing?"

Ha ha, CLEARLY, I AM NOT, Google! Come on! I mean, I just wrote a 50,000-word novel in three hours! How serious could I be? I write jokes about James Joyce!
banana

Uncle Tue. Poll (Oh!)

I was too busy to do this yesterday. I'm very, very sorry.

Poll #1083884 Tuesday Election! Er, Poll! Time! For YOU!

Which of the following Skullbucket features interests you the least?

your increasingly abstract and pointless attempts at humor
0(0.0%)
your impotent rambling about politics
1(2.9%)
your endless whining about how much you suck
20(57.1%)
your unimpressive blathering about freelance work
1(2.9%)
your occasional tedious discussions of your day job
0(0.0%)
any post where you talk about comics, video games or music
1(2.9%)
when you ramble on and on about personal projects no one cares about
1(2.9%)
polls
5(14.3%)
this really should be a check box question, because I hate many if not all of these things
5(14.3%)
other (see Comments)
1(2.9%)

Do you have any tattoos, Brad?

No. My body is a temple. A temple with no art on the walls.
12(32.4%)
Yes, one.
4(10.8%)
Yes, more than one but less than five.
1(2.7%)
Yes, more than five.
1(2.7%)
Yes, more than ten.
0(0.0%)
Yes, and here are pictures!
0(0.0%)
Who's "Brad"?
5(13.5%)
What are "tattoos"?
1(2.7%)
Does it count if they're drawn on with a Sharpie?
5(13.5%)
I can't believe you quoted Rocky Horror. That's just sad.
8(21.6%)

If you had a giant pile of money, what living accessories would you acquire?

midget (Kid Rock)
0(0.0%)
chimp (Michael Jackson)
0(0.0%)
tiny dog (Paris Hilton)
2(5.6%)
falcon (Lord Snowdon)
3(8.3%)
python (Jake Roberts)
1(2.8%)
Third World infant (Angelina Jolie)
0(0.0%)
aggregation of large-breasted women (Hugh Hefner)
3(8.3%)
alien (Harry S Truman)
5(13.9%)
devoted cult of castrated dingbats (Marshall Applewhite)
2(5.6%)
other (see Comments)
2(5.6%)

What is your favorite Mr. T role?

Clubber Lang
7(19.4%)
Samson
0(0.0%)
Bruise Brubaker
0(0.0%)
B.A. Baracus
8(22.2%)
T.S. Turner
0(0.0%)
Mr. T
11(30.6%)
guy in that music video who throws you out of a window if you don't honor your father and your mother
10(27.8%)

Come up with an idea for an invention I can steal and make a billion dollars.