January 7th, 2010

hey

I am not dead yet: 2010 edition

Hello, all! Hope you had a lovely holiday season. I am, as you can see, not dead yet, which is about the best anyone can say. I'm sorry I haven't been around more; I will try to rectify this in the future. I've missed you in the last few non-posting months; if you have gotten married, had children, died, discovered your long-denied secret love for me, or had any other life-changing experience, please catch me up on it in comments.

Meanwhile, let's start the year off with some whoring. Behold: a new episode of Wasted Words to which you can listen!

The other night, I woke up at around 2AM and stumbled to the bathroom to piss. I spotted one of those monster palmetto bug perched on the top rail of my shower, and naturally, I wanted to kill it, because those things are the Devil's own cock-a-roaches. Unfortunately, I was half-dazed from sleep, and there was no bug spray in the bathroom, and if I'd gone back to my bedroom to get a shoe, it would have gotten away. So instead I unloaded on the fucker with some megadosage from a can of Glade Air Infusions. The bug seemed more confused than injured by this, but it did flee the premises, and I am hoping that it eventually died from what I am calling Peach-Scented Cockroach Genocide. HAPPY NEW YEAR!