The problem is, Conklin has no website, and thus I am condemned to reading his insanely funny writing on a far too infrequent basis. Websites are still free and plentiful, despite the dot-collapse, as the fact that a cheap bastard like me has like six of them indicates. And sure, he's lazy, but no more so than most of my other dope-sotten lumpenproletariat writer friends.
So how can I force him to get a website? There must be something. Something. He has no shame, so there's that. Maybe, since he's a government employee, I could threaten to rat him out if he doesn't entertain me on a more regular basis. Any ideas?