Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator
ludickid

Like, it's totally trashy!

So I know you are all wondering: just want, exactly, the fuck did Leonard find in his dumpster that was so goddamn awesome that he made me wait all night for me to find out?

I will tell you. It was...

A TRASH CAN!



What, you say? That's it?

Yep! A trash can!



That's totally retarded, you say? Well what if I told you that this is not an ordinary trash can, but rather a CRAZY TRASH CAN MADE FOR THE YOUNG PEOPLE WAY BACK IN THE MID-'60s AND IT HAS NUTTY HIPPIE SLOGANS ALL OVER IT? What if I told you it was made and sold at the precise moment when bald, overweight, peptic, cigar-chomping marketing executives all over America collectively said "Hell, I dunno, maybe these kids with their crazy hair, maybe we can sell them some damn thing before they destroy America"? What if I told you that this trash can is nothing less than an episode of Rowan & Martin's "Laugh-In", in trash can form?!?




It's hurtful comments like this that keep Bruce Wayne in a state of permanent arrested pre-adolescence.


It's things like this inexplicable comment (who the fuck is the White Knight?) that tip me that this is now kitchy knockoff, but a gen-u-wine artifact of the dopey days when hippies were transitioning from scary social threat to brand-new teen demographic. Also the fact that the thing is really fucking weathered.


Okay, I'll...wait, do what again?


Kato, oddly, was also yellow. OH HO! THE RACIAL HUMOR!


This joke was already ancient when Star Trek nerds told it for the first time. And yet here it is, featured among the cutting-edge humor on this hippie waste receptacle.


This is a pretty conservative statement from such a left-wing metal can. Its politics confuse me. I suspect this can of being a Humphrey voter.


Aah, the old classic. You know, it's not like it's either/or. A lot of the guys in Iraq get laid more than I do, and it's not like I'm swimming in trim during peacetime.


HA HA! TAKE THAT CHAIRMAN MAO! If only this trash can had been in wider circulation, the horrors of totalitarian Chinese communist rule might have long since become a thing of the past. I bet he totally freaked when he read this!


You're making me nervous, hippie can.


Far out, man.


Before there was "LET YOUR FREAK FLAG FLY", long before there was "THINK DIFFERENT", there was a simple salmon-colored button named "I'M PECULIAR".


After its earlier statement, this welfare-state endorsement sounds a bit contradictory. But you know these hippie cans, they're so hopped up on goofballs they don't know what they're saying.


Man. That's...that's so, you know, heavy.


Once again, the hippie garbage can speaks truth to power. Where conformist plastic waste bins are afraid to confront the vital social issues of the day, hippie can tells it like it is.


Think...


...again.


This is my favorite slogan on hippie can, or maybe my second-favorite after "CHAIRMAN MAO IS A FINK". Something about the courage to buy a trash can that expresses the rebellious viewpoint that painting your toes facilitates bliss makes me kinda fall in love with whoever used to own this thing.


A little highbrow humor for the artsy crowd. Note tasteful ear-shaped graphic.


One of the timeless truths, the eternal verities, expressed in the form of a pointing cartoon finger, which is how you know it's right.

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