Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator
ludickid

Special for Yahoo! front page readers

I'M ALL OVER FREE CHICKEN! reads the ad on Yahoo!'s front page, advertising one free chicken strip on Thursday. That's lame, but it's not as lame as it could be. In terms of out-dated, limp-sounding faux-urban slang, they could have done even worse.

This free chicken is off the heezy for sheezy!
I'm all about free chicken!
I got free chicken all up in there!
I'm down with F-R-E(-E-C-H-I-C-K-E-N)!
I got free chicken'd!
I like the chicken, the chicken that goes "free"!
Free Mumia! And chicken!
My free chicken brings all the boys to the yard!
Free chicken in the house!
Jam on it! It being the free chicken!

Now you. Be trite. Prize for the best one is FREE CHICKEN!

(EDIT: Holy fucking shit, look at this insane fucking site I found while trying to find a static jpg of the "I'm all over free chicken" ad: it's "I-AM-ASIAN.COM", a page about how all sorts of ethnically rambunctious Asians just loves them some Mickey Donald's! Yes, gooks, wogs, chinks, ragheads, charlies, nips, and slopes can all agree, crappy American mass-produced fast food is part of the richness of the Asian experience! This has to be the most insulting thing since the 'everyone in this commercial is black' trend of the late '80s:

We're Asian and Pacific Islander Americans and our diverse cultures and our everyday American lifestyle are becoming one. We're hanging on to our great traditions while we move to the beat of the times. We honor our heritage and we love being Americans. From high fashion to high tech, from Asian Pacific American hip hop to haute cuisine, we're weaving the threads of our culture into the fabric of everyday American life. Whether we're celebrating one of our cultural holidays or enjoying a Big Mac sandwich, we're helping make the magic mix called America become even richer. And McDonald's is right there with us, everyday! We are proud of our cultural heritage.

Yes, whether we're working with computers or co-opting our culture for rich New York fashion plates, we can always take a break from turntablism and working at a takeout joint to enjoy a Big Mac sandwich, even if it's Chinese New Year! But not Ramadan! No beef for the Indians, please, but still, yum yum! It's a tasty and not at all patronizing experience!

MAN, MCDONALDS, SERIOUSLY!)
Tags: eats, laffs
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  • HONK

    If I was to wish someone a happy birthday today, would it be crepedelbebe? You're goddamn right it would.

  • I'm too stoned to give a full accounting

    I went to Austin this weekend. As you may know, my beloved first-generation iPod, Misty II, fatally deceased herself recently, and I got a new 80G…

  • Notes from a day

    * Stringing a crossbow is usually considered a two-man job. But when one of the two men is me, the other man is unnecessary. Also, it is possible to…