Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator

"I am and have always been a healer" (Melissa Etheridge)

I'm in a pretty swell mood this morning, since I got a lot of sleep, had a lovely conversation with my outstanding girlfriend ninafarina, finished up a bunch of freelance work, continued reading a fine novel, and heard my beloved White Sox mount a massive comeback win against the hated 'Toons. But that doesn't mean I won't complain about stuff!

For a while now, the Chicago Sun-Times has been running a dopey ongoing feature where famous and quasi-famous people discuss their relationship with God. Most of the interviewees come down pretty solidly on the side of Christianity, especially the politicians; a few of them, mostly entertainers, mix in a little eastern philosophy (yoga, Buddhism, etc.); and occasionally there's a token agnostic (Annie Lennox and Bill Maher -- who rails against organized religion while being happily prodded by the interviewer). It's all pretty dumb and uninformative, with lots of missed opportunities; for example, why didn't they ask Jack Ryan how forcing his wife to dance naked at titty bars fits into his strict Roman Catholic faith?

But the best interview comes from overrated Cubs manager Dusty Baker, a devout Baptist (except for the odd voodoo session or kahuna worship) who never seems to wonder why God stuck him with the hapless bunch of losers he works with. Here's the real money quote, from when he's discussing crazy nut Carlos Zambrano's tendency to speak in tongues on the field:

"Any man who believes in God is a good man."

HA HA HA HA RIGHT! And no one who speaks German could possibly be an evil man! I mean, shit, just look at history, dude: there's never been an evil man who believes in God, ever!

Anyway. There's some other funny stuff in there, too, like:

"I'm not a turn-the-cheek type of Christian," Baker says. "I believe in a more gladiator/warrior type."

So, in other words, I'm not the kind of Christian that, say, Christ was. I'm more of the kind of Christian who does things opposite of Christ's teachings.

But it's a fun read, the whole series, especially if you, like me, are just dying to know about the rich inner spiritual life of Mancow Muller and 'life coach' Iyanla Vanzant.
Tags: jeebus, news

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