Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator

Get these homos out of our town halls!

This week in Town Hall, the neo-cons are all up in arms about the dire threat to our republic posed by men and women who seek the nocturnal company of other men and women. The stock market has apparently collapsed, democracy in Iraq is now in the hands of the same oligarchs who control it here in America, and our ruling party seems to think that the judiciary should be subject to their whim, but the real issue worth dwelling on these days is that somewhere, somehow, boys are kissing each other:

Dennis "My Son Has a Black Friend" Prager laments the 'postmodernists' and 'feminist theorists' (quotes his) who have taken over our colleges and trained our daughters not to be heterosexuals.

Mike "I AM NOT A SCREECHING HYSTERIC!" S. Adams totally bites my style while criticizing the theological errors of a priest/professor at predominantly Catholic Gonzaga University who believes that God might be all turned around on this gay-hating thing.

Doug "The Jim Rome of Neoconservativism" Giles cites the always-reliable Washington Times as evidence that women are tired of those fruity, quasi-European metrosexual queerboys.

Warren "Yes, It's My Real Name" Throckmorton beefs that gays are demanding respect, but they refuse to respect people who think their existence is an affront to God.

But it's not all bad news! Bill "Golly Darn!" Murchison has discovered that students at the highly prestigious Princeton University -- not all of them southern Baptists -- are exploring the rich possibilities of abstinence.

It's morning in America, people! Don't find yourself waking up next to a same-sex partner! Or anybody, for that matter, unless you're married to them!
Tags: politics, town hall roundup

  • Dueling: The Interminable Continuation

    More nuggets: - Abraham Lincoln almost fought a duel once. He wrote an anonymous letter protesting Illinois tax policy, and the law's sponsor found…

  • Dueling: the Fascinating Facts

    So I'm reading this book on the history of dueling. It's called Gentlemen's Blood and is written in an amusing high-whoopsie style by historian…

  • The Death of Irony, Chapter XXXVIII

    Here is a nice passage from Sore Winners, a surprisingly thoughtful book of essays on post-9/11 culture by John Powers, a film critic and editor at…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.