Perhaps you remember him as a wild but effective lefty fireballer who closed for the Atlanta Braves. More likely you remember him as a colossal asshole who offended half the planet by calling one of his teammates a "fat monkey", being an incorrigable sexist, bitching about how bad Asian drivers are, and saying that he hated New York because of how you could ride the train and run into junkies and purple-haired freaks and welfare mothers and queers with AIDS.
What you may not know is that he's making a comeback of sorts, pitching for a minor-league team in, of all places, Long Island, New York. Happily, the comeback won't last long because, frankly, he sucks. He's still wild as hell and only throws a strike one out of every five pitches or so, but it matters more now, because his fabled velocity is gone and he can barely break 90, let alone a bat. What's not gone is his equally fabled big fat asshole mouth.
Let's hear what John "I Hate Them Queers With AIDS" Rocker has to say about his life to date:
"I've taken a lot of crap from a lot of people," Rocker told ESPN.com. "Probably more than anybody in the history of this sport. I know Hank (Aaron) and Jackie (Robinson) took a good deal of crap, but I guarantee it wasn't for six years."
So, to make this perfectly clear: John Rocker, a privileged white Southern male millionaire, says that he has had a worse time of it than Jackie Robinson. JACKIE ROBINSON, the nigger who white racists wanted to lynch more than any nigger in America. The man who put up with a lifetime of death threats, not because he complained about all the faggots and darkies and weirdos in New York, but because he was a black man who wanted to play baseball. The man who often heard the vilest of imprecations hurled at him not only from thousands of fans, but from other players, sometimes on his own team. The man who literally died of stress at a too-young age because the price of his breaking the color barrier was remaining silent and eating megatons of shit heaped on him by every dumb, John-Rocker-esque cracker in America. That's the guy who didn't have to put up with as much crap as John Rocker.
Fuck this guy. Some New Yorker needs to take the initiative -- fuck throwing batteries at his ass, he needs to be gunned down on the LIRR.