Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator
ludickid

There's two things you don't talk about...

...here's the other one.

Poll #521907 Another offensive, pointless, stereotype-laden poll

How would you categorize your political views?

I am a Republican
0(0.0%)
I am a Democrat
3(5.1%)
I am a social and economic conservative
1(1.7%)
I am a social and economic liberal
15(25.4%)
I am a social conservative, but an economic liberal
1(1.7%)
I am a social liberal, but an economic conservative
11(18.6%)
I am a socialist
6(10.2%)
I am a communist
1(1.7%)
I am an anarchist
0(0.0%)
I am a fascist
1(1.7%)
I am a theocrat
0(0.0%)
I am some other thing that generally skews "right"
0(0.0%)
I am some other thing that generally skews "left"
15(25.4%)
I reject all your restrictive, hidebound political definitions, pig
5(8.5%)
I am James Lileks
0(0.0%)

How did you vote in the last presidential election?

Republican
1(1.7%)
Democrat
49(83.1%)
Green
1(1.7%)
Libertarian
1(1.7%)
Other
1(1.7%)
I did not vote because I despise the sham of 'free' elections
0(0.0%)
I did not vote because I was not allowed to do so
0(0.0%)
I did not vote because I am lazy
0(0.0%)
I did not vote because I was too young
0(0.0%)
I did not vote because I am not an American citizen
1(1.7%)
I did not vote because voting is for sissies
0(0.0%)
I did not vote because no candidate adequately represented my interests
0(0.0%)
Like I'm gonna tell you who I voted for
2(3.4%)
I voted in the elections of a different country
2(3.4%)
In the what now?
1(1.7%)

Briefly describe your political self-identification.

Have you made significant changes to your political views in the last 20 years?

No
14(23.7%)
Not significant changes, but only very slight ones
7(11.9%)
Yes, I used to be more conservative but have become more liberal
13(22.0%)
Yes, I used to be more liberal but have become more conservative
8(13.6%)
Yes, I used to be more centrist but have become radicalized
3(5.1%)
Yes, I used to be more centrist but have become reactionary
1(1.7%)
Yes, but you have to guess how
9(15.3%)
I think this whole poll is gay and politics are for homos
0(0.0%)
I am a gay homo and I find the previous option highly offensive
1(1.7%)
Maybe
3(5.1%)

Check all that apply: are your political views at significant variance from those of your immediate family/loved ones/significant other?

No, our political views are largely identical
7(12.1%)
No, our political views are generally similar
13(22.4%)
No, we are all apolitical as a rule
0(0.0%)
I don't know/don't care/never bothered to find out
2(3.4%)
Yes, they are slightly more liberal than I am
0(0.0%)
Yes, they are significantly more liberal than I am
0(0.0%)
Yes, they are slightly more conservative than I am
10(17.2%)
Yes, they are significantly more conservative than I am
12(20.7%)
Yes, our political views are completely and totally divergent
1(1.7%)
I said, I don't have a family/loved one/significant other! Why do you keep torturing me?
0(0.0%)

In which political enterprises do you/have you participate(d)?

I vote
2(3.4%)
I attempt to stay informed about local and national political affairs
0(0.0%)
I am active in a political cause, party or interest group
0(0.0%)
I donate money to the political party of my choice
0(0.0%)
I volunteer for/work for the political party of my choice
0(0.0%)
I have run for office
0(0.0%)
I have worked for a specific political candidate
0(0.0%)
I have engaged in 'get-out-the-vote' programs
0(0.0%)
I have written letters to the editor about politics
0(0.0%)
I have written/called/spoken to my elected representatives
0(0.0%)
I am professionally involved in politics
0(0.0%)
I am an elected official
0(0.0%)
I go to the barbershop and complain loudly about that bunch of bums in Washington
0(0.0%)
I rate elected officials on a "Hot or Not?" scale
0(0.0%)
I think caring about politics is for Melvins
1(1.7%)

Since comparing people and things to Hitler or the Nazi party is clearly played out, what should be the next big rhetorical cudgel?

Saying something is worse than Stalin
4(6.9%)
Saying something is twice as bad as Pol Pot
2(3.4%)
Saying something is three times as bad as Genghis Khan
1(1.7%)
Saying something is at least five times less desirable than having one's face bitten off by Dr. Hannibal Lecter
7(12.1%)
Saying something is worse than Dracula and Galactus put together by a factor of ten
13(22.4%)
Saying that compared to something, the Great Depression wasn't so bad
3(5.2%)
Saying that compared to something, slavery was actually pretty good
4(6.9%)
Saying that compared to something, the Black Plague is like going to St. Kitts & Nevis for a beach holiday
5(8.6%)
Saying that compared to something, the invasion of Earth by hostile, powerful Martians would be like dying and going to Heaven where you would become God's best friend and doubles partner
5(8.6%)
Saying that something is worse than saying something else is worse than Hitler
14(24.1%)
Tags: politics, polls
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