Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator
ludickid

Hillbilly crimewave!

SERGEANT’S DUTY LOG

Week ending 07/17/2005

31 incidents of jawin’ with intent to slanderfy.

26 incidents of reported sinful doin’s involving minors, blood kin, livestock and tree hollers

16 incidents of a-whoopin’ and a-hollerin’.

9 lynchings without a permit

8 incidents of Katie-bar-the-door Saturday night dust-ups.

6 incidents of ee-legal tar fars.

4 incidents of bootleggin’ shine without thems ain’t got no papers.

3 incidents of turnin’ a squirrel-iron on a revenuer.

1 attempted hold-up of that store down to the city where all the money is at.

1 incident of computer-aided wire fraud and international margin trading to conceal taxable investment income (that damn Hettieburg kid again)
Tags: laffs
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