If you're desperate to read things I wrote that are even duller than this LiveJournal, you can head to the latest issue of UR and see tiny excerpts of my pieces on Kid Koala and beer-centered road trips. I also have a piece and a couple of new restaurant reviews up in the latest issue of Time Out, but they recently made their online content subscriber-only, so I can't show it to you. (This is one of the downsides of paid freelance work.)
If you're desperate to hang out with me and hear me tell stories even dumber than the ones on this LiveJournal, please do come to my patio sale this Saturday and Sunday (which will also be beer-centered), and don't forget that next month, I'll be reading at the hugely successful and always a bunch of drunken fun Funny Ha-Ha 4Ever (Hideout, Aug. 10th, sponsored by megablogger Claire Zulkey and hotshot novelist John Green).
Other than that, though, alls I got is more damn IMDB message board excerpts.
Thank you, Penn Juliet, for killing something I loved
This joke is sacred to many people including myself. Often considered the single funniest joke in the world, much of that is due to its SECRECY! It is to be told to a private audience, in a casual setting, not to any average american idiot who wants to pay their 9 bucks to Penn Juliet so that they can hear 100 of the biggest names tell their version. thank you, Penn, for destroying something sacred to me and many other fans of comedy out there. You have killed something beautiful.
My opinion: I'm sure Kurdt's death wasn't a suicide. The documentary Kurt and Courtney speaks for itself. Kurt had taken a lot of heroin a couple minutes before he supposedly pulled the trigger. How can someone have good enough judgement to do that while they are on heroin? There were no fingerprints on the shot gun. And if he used his foot then why were his shoes on? It was said he used his right hand to shoot himself, but he's left-handed. And it's also said the "suicide note" was actually a letter stating that he was leaving the band Nirvana, and the bottom part was somebody elses handwriting. AND Kurt and Courtney were planning to get a divorce soon, plus Courtney's first album in her band Hole was released the same week Kurt died. "El Duce" who was a friend of Courtney's claimed she asked him to kill her husband for $50,000 by shooting him in the head. He thought it was a joke. After this statement, he was soon killed. All of that was in the documentary. Yeh...I think that's enough to say Courtney is a bish that needs to die. Patoo.
If u had the chance to be naked on a derserted island with any celeb, who would it be?
I would probly have to pik Scarlett-HOT, and Jessica Biel-great body