Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator

Willie Chicken-Shack's R&J Brandy

BILL: Okay, listen to this.

BACON: Hit me.

BILL: "But soft, what light..."

BACON: Wait, what? Butt soft? Who's he talking about?

BILL: Juliet.

BACON: He's talking about how her butt is soft? What kinda shit is that? They're never gonna let you say that.

BILL: No, no, "BUT soft". Like, he's saying, "hold on".

BACON: Why don't you just have him say "hold on", then?

BILL: Because this way it sounds...

BACON: Or "ho there"?

BILL: Who where?

BACON: Ho there.

BILL: What ho? What where?

BACON: What is this, an Abbott and Costello routine?

BILL: Who's Abbott Ann Costello?

BACON: Forget it. Just read the thing.

BILL: "But soft! What light through yonder window..."

BACON: Yonder window?

BILL: That's what I said.

BACON: What is he, a hillbilly?

BILL: Oh, what would you put? Smart guy.

BACON: How about "What light though that window"?

BILL: Doesn't fit the meter.

BACON: "That there window"?

BILL: Now who's a hillbilly?

BACON: This is stupid.

BILL: You're stupid.

BACON: How much longer is this going to take?

BILL: Depends on how much you're going to keep interrupting me.

BACON: Go ahead.

BILL: "But soft! What light through yonder window breaks?"

BACON: Breaks? Like, breakdances?

BILL: Now you're just being difficult.

BACON: Fine.

BILL: "It is the east, and Juliet is the sun."

BACON: The son?

BILL: Right.

BACON: The son of who?

BILL: She is the sun.

BACON: So, that's the big twist?

BILL: Twist?

BACON: That's the twist ending? Juliet is a guy?

BILL: I don't know why I collaborate with you.
Tags: laffs

  • The Party of What People?

    This will be my last entry of 2016.  Next year will begin, barring some unexpected act of fate, with the ascension to the presidency of Donald…

  • America the Impossible

    Today is the Fourth of July, America’s national holiday.  Longtime readers of this site will know that every day on this year, I post a little…

  • Deep Reads #6: Forces in the Field

    From  The Trouble with Principle by Stanley Fish: “Many bad things are now being done in the name of neutral principles, and I hope it is…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 1 comment