Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator

Headlines from the Liberal War on Christmas

Exploding Yule Log Kills 8 in Arlington Heights

Heavy Street Fighting Reported Outside Santa's Village

Pro-Noelist Fifth Columnists Exposed By Response to 'Happy Holidays' Greeting

Police Sweep Suburbs for Christmas Wrapping Storehouses

Santa Escapes Special Forces Pursuit Outside Tora Bora

Casualties in St. Nicholas Day Massacre May Top 6,000

Acting Supreme Court Supports Death Penalty For Any Mention of Christ During December

Elite Hannukah Squadron Claims Victory Against 'Wenceslas Battalion'

Jack Frost Found Hanged in Cell

Tainted Reindeer Meat Scare in Boston

Snow Declared Counter-Revolutionary Force; President Dispatches Blow-Dryer Units to All Metropolitan Areas

Elven-Americans Ordered to Report to Internment Camps
Tags: laffs

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