Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator

More stuff to annoy my girlfriend

In conjunction with calamityjon's Goodtime Laffs Factory (his entry here), it's...

NAME: Damien Hellstrom
CLUBS: German Society; Boy Scouts of America (Eagle); Young Satanists Club.
ACTIVITIES: Jazz Band (second guitar); DHS Hesher's Guild; Smoking Patio Maintenance Crew.
SPORTS: JV Basketball; Track & Field (javelin).
SENIOR QUOTE: "'Tis better to reign in hell than to serve in heaven."
BIO: The self-dubbed 'Son of Satan' (or 'Son of Kong', as some wags have called him) never lets you forget that his father is a very important man. His thrash-metal stylings are a selling point for his band, Demöniakk, but Mr. Penfield, the music teacher, says they don't quite work in "Stardust"!
"You guys rock!!!11!! P.S. Call me, okay?" -- Patsy Walker
"Always reach 4 the stars + SURF NAKED!" -- Bill Howardstein
"Have a great summer, and don't get on Eric Payne's case too much when you guys are working together at the Orange Julius. XXOO" -- Jan van Dyne

NAME: Barbara Norriss
CLUBS: German Society; Junior Norsemen; Girls In The Trades.
ACTIVITIES: Industrial Arts; Volunteer Construction Crew (New Gym, Ladies' Sports Annex, Armory); Theatre (1-4); Quill & Staff (4).
SPORTS: Girls' Rugby (Varsity); Ladies' Golf (Varsity); Ladies' Tennis (JV); Girls' Hockey (Varsity); Boys' Football (court order).
SENIOR QUOTE: "O goddess, from my heart remove/the wasting cares and pains of love."
BIO: Big Babs is a godsend to the Black Goliaths' championship golf and hockey teams, and is also a lesser though legally required addition to the football team. She's developed quite a close friendship with Patsy Walker over senior year! Odds are you'll find her writing poetry under a tree near the quad, or when it's time to show her sensitive side, molding a '72 Buick front fender into a stylish belt in Mr. Homolka's metal shop.
"Hey, Barbara -- it was mostly great to have you on the team this year! Remember when you sacked me during a practice game and broke three of my ribs so I couldn't play the rest of the year? Some of the guys are still talking about that!" -- Kyle Richmond
"Thanks for being a friend. And please stop beating yourself up over my fish, cockatiel and dog dying when you house-sat in October." -- Isaac Christian
"Have a blessed summer, Barbara! It's been great getting to know you this year! I hope we can spend more time together, but I'm not sure where I'll be over the break, so you probably shouldn't call, or come by my father's store." -- Patsy Walker

NAME: Warren Worthington III
CLUBS: Junior Achievement (president); We-Own-U Networking for Teens; Junior Republicans; Young Americans for Freedom.
ACTIVITIES: Student Council (Vice-President 3; President 4); Yearbook Staff (editor 2, 3, 4); Birdwatchers Club; Future Plutocrats Dinner Mixer fundraiser; Prom King (3, 4).
SPORTS: Football (JV); Golf (Varsity).
SENIOR QUOTE: "Virtue has never been as respectable as money."
BIO: Dreamboat Warren is certainly the big man on campus this year. With his money, good looks and fancy car (though we never see him driving it...), why wouldn't he be? Despite his flawed fashion sense (what's with all the bulky overcoats?), we still want to know: did it hurt when he fell from heaven?
"U + ME = TLA" -- Candy Southern
"Hi-ho, Double Dub! What say you and I race out to that too, too charming club up in East Point? I'll see you at work this summer...NOT!" -- Stephen Strange
"Hulk demand rematch on links! Hulk use lob wedge instead of sand wedge! Hulk win little gold man!" -- Bruce Banner
"Hey, motherfucker, thanks for letting me sign your motherfucking yearbook! I notice I'm not in it! And neither is anyone else who looks like me! Just like at your motherfucking country club, you cracker-ass honky faggot!" -- Luke Cage
Tags: comics, geek, laffs

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