Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator

"Who are you yelling at, dad?" "The guy who doesn't live there."

I know James Lileks is a big fan of The Simpsons; it would be fun if he uses his ample free time to go back, re-watch every episode, and figure out which jokes are specifically about him. In today's Bleat, he proves that even when I completely agree with him, he's still an asshole.

He talks about going to a reception at the Walker Art Museum that was catered by Wolfgang Puck. Then, after this shameless piece of namedropping, he attempts to defuse charges of shameless namedropping by an admission that he was "insufficiently impressed" with the famous chef. "I mean I’m sure he’s a nice guy and I like the food," says Jimmy, thus covering the two things any sane person might be curious about re: Wolfgang Puck, "but he’s not God." Who exactly has been going around claiming Wolfgang Puck is God is not made manifest; a Google search of the phrase 'Wolfgang Puck is God' reveals no direct matches, but at least now we know that whoever else is saying that, James Lileks isn't.

He goes on to claim that he finds the interior of the Walker confusing and poorly laid out. Now, here's the thing: I completely and totally agree with this statement. I have been to the Walker with my girlfriend, and while it's a fine museum, the interior of the newly redesigned and explanded building also struck me as confusing and poorly laid out. So you might think there would be no reason for me to grit my teeth in agony at what a self-righteous pouty-pants Lileks is being, right? Since I agree with him and all? Nope, wrong.

Here's the comment he drops near the end of his otherwise sensible observations about the haphazard layout of the Walker's floor plans:

How damnably clever, no? You bourgeois cows with your staircase-expectations and your gross American guts filled with lager-piss! We spit on your presumptious[sic]!

This is italicized, as if it's a quote from whoever it is who designed the Walker. I say "whoever" because I don't know who designed it; and if Lileks knows, he certainly doesn't do us the favor of saying so. However, it's clear from this quote that he thinks they're (a) communists and (b) Europeans. Because obviously, no good Red-state American could possibly have designed such a...a...socialist-feeling staircase! Yes, the man who thinks that in the Soviet Union, the sun itself rebelled against the soul-crushing totalitarianism of socialist rule likewise seems to think that only an America-hating pinko could possibly have designed such a traditional-values-flaunting stair. Of course, maybe the staircase really WAS designed by leftist Eurotrash, but Lileks doesn't do us the favor of telling; he just sort of assumes, despite the fact that flag-burning Marxists would probably not be in the business of designing Midwestern art museums, that anything that so confronted his aesthetic sensibilities simply must be the product of a Red fifth column. Sigh.

EDIT: I looked it up, and the Walker expansion was done by the Swiss firm of Herzog & De Meuron. The primary architects were the two Swiss partners and two Americans in their employ. Though (half-)European, it is doubtful that the design team, whose previous efforts consist largely of football stadia, wineries, and other musea, have much interest in spitting on the values of the hated Yank bourgeois.
Tags: lileks watch

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