Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator

What we learned from Friday's poll

- Coke was preferred over Pepsi 19-8, and diet drinks preferred to regular by a narrow 14-13 vote. While "other" choices constituted a minority, no single named drink got as many votes as Diet Coke. This only confirms my longtime suspicion that said beverage contains a secret addictive ingredient comparable in its potency to heroin.

- The most popular adult beverage was beer, edging out wine 37-32. Whiskey was third, setting up a possibly future poll question if I ever get that bored. Gin was the least popular hard liquor, leading me to believe you people just don't know the joys of a Bombay Sapphire on the rocks of a hot summer night, and while three of you copped to drinking wine coolers, no one would admit to drinking rubbing alcohol. Seven of you are sissy marys who don't drink. Enjoy the many years you will be dead, teetotalers!

- Readers of this journal were most likely (49%) to have been drama fags in high school, no doubt explaining all the unattractive, self-involved homosexuals who find me a figure of identification. Bizarrely, more people admitted to being goth kids than admitted to being hippies, as if one was better than the other. A mere three of you are courageous, honest and/or egotistical enough to claim that you were popular and well-liked in high school; none of you would admit to being gang members, because you were all apparently too busy trying for the lead in Bye Bye Birdy to jack people's cars or deal weed. Sad. (rjwhite gets bonus sad points for attempting to convince people that he was on the cool kids' version of the AV club.)

- Literature is far and away your favored art form, followed by music, film and telling me to go fuck myself.

- Many of you look forward, in your dotage, to complaining about the young people these days, or about how I should go fuck myself. But the winner is, once again, moondispatches, for the answer (much improved if read in an indefinable eastern European accent) "All these ladies, they want me to sex them. I already sexed them twice today." God bless us every one!
Tags: trivium


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