Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator
ludickid

Last one, I promise

Poll #695772 HOT MESS!

What is your favorite chapter-ending line from R. Kelly's "Trapped in the Closet"?

"Now he's opening the closet."
0(0.0%)
"I can't believe it's a man!"
2(4.3%)
"A man picks up the phone."
1(2.2%)
"Oh my God, a rubber!"
4(8.7%)
"That was the policeman that stopped you."
1(2.2%)
"All of the sudden, pow!"
1(2.2%)
"It's Rosie the nosey neighbor."
2(4.3%)
"Somebody is still right there in his home."
0(0.0%)
"Not only is there a man in the cabinet, but the man is a midget."
15(32.6%)
"They turn and look at each other like, 'What the hell?'..."
1(2.2%)
"Not only am I sleepin' with Big Man, but he's my baby's daddy."
1(2.2%)
"Gwen, I'm sorry, girl, but that ho was me."
0(0.0%)
They're all so great, I can't choose
2(4.3%)
I like the little echoey murmurs he does at the end of each one
1(2.2%)
Enough with the R. Kelly polls
15(32.6%)

What is your favorite plot hole in R. Kelly's "Trapped in the Closet"?

How Bridget claims to be on the rag even though her husband knows she's pregnant
0(0.0%)
How Cathy and Sylvester don't recognize each other even though Cathy is best friends with his wife
5(10.9%)
How Gwen somehow knows that James pulled Sylvester over earlier in the day even though she wasn't there
2(4.3%)
How Sylvester doesn't know how James knows Chuck and Rufus even though earlier his wife explained they introduced her to James
1(2.2%)
How Sylvester seems to know about events and conversations that took place while he wasn't there
1(2.2%)
How Bridget claims to be the one who paid off Big Man, although it's not clear for what reason
4(8.7%)
How probably about six hours pass between the time Sylvester leaves Cathy's apartment and the time the people in it start talking again
3(6.5%)
How the entire story is just one big plot hole
5(10.9%)
Those aren't plot holes! They will totally be explained in the next 20 chapters.
8(17.4%)
Seriously, man, enough with the fucking R. Kelly polls
17(37.0%)

What actor from R. Kelly's "Trapped in the Closet" has the most promising future?

R. Kelly ("Sylvester")
2(5.6%)
Cat Wilson ("Gwen")
2(5.6%)
LeShay Tomlinson ("Cathy"/"Mary")
1(2.8%)
Rolando Boyce ("Rufus")
2(5.6%)
Malik S. Middleton ("Chuck")
1(2.8%)
Michael Kenneth Williams ("James")
5(13.9%)
Rebecca Field ("Bridget")
0(0.0%)
Eric Lane ("Twan")
4(11.1%)
Drevon Cooks ("Big Man")
5(13.9%)
LaDonna Tittle ("Rosey the Nosey Neighbor")
14(38.9%)

With what role do you most identify?

Hot-headed, gun-wielding Lothario with no fixed occupation
4(10.3%)
Woman who lounges around all day in house filled with portraits of her husband
3(7.7%)
Crusty old wig-wearing-ass ho
2(5.1%)
Foul-mouthed homosexual pastor
6(15.4%)
Effeminate homosexual deacon
0(0.0%)
Chain-smoking miscegenating police officer
3(7.7%)
Overweight pregnant hick with cherry allergy
2(5.1%)
Well-dressed dwarf stripper with bowel control issues
7(17.9%)
Muscular, bulletproof, homicidal ex-convict
0(0.0%)
Spatula-wielding senile dementia sufferer
12(30.8%)

What did you most enjoy about the sex scene in R. Kelly's "Trapped in the Closet"?

How Sylvester interrupts his wife's orgasm because he is having a leg cramp
5(10.9%)
How Sylvester keeps his pants on the entire time
2(4.3%)
How Sylvester seems to think that deeper penetration will result in pregnancy
1(2.2%)
How Gwen has the twitchiest orgasm since Elizabeth Berkeley in "Showgirls"
0(0.0%)
How they have sex under a giant portrait of R. Kelly
5(10.9%)
How R. Kelly sort of implies that he goes down on his wife, but doesn't really dwell on it lest we think he's a sissy
0(0.0%)
How Gwen doesn't bother to take the condom wrapper out of the bed even though she knows her husband is on the way home
0(0.0%)
How it's exactly like my own sex life
1(2.2%)
There was nothing to like about that scene
2(4.3%)
I'm not kidding, man, no more fucking R. Kelly
14(30.4%)
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