Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator

Thanks; thanks a lot

As many of you know, for the past, oh, ten years or so, my good friend thaitea and I were in the habit of throwing what I called “The Expatriate’s Thanksgiving”. Each year, we would throw a day-long party of drinking and dining for all our friends who either couldn’t spend the holiday with our families or didn’t want to. It was a day I really looked forward to, probably the high point of my year holiday-wise – I got to cook a huge meal, hang out with friends, and do all the cheeseball holiday stuff that I secretly love in my black and evil heart.

This year, of course, due to major flaws in that black evil heart, I am neither doing the Expatriate Thanksgiving nor spending the day with the woman I love. Instead, I simply look forward to four days off to write and listen to music and read and watch TV, and occasionally drink half a bottle of Scotch and end up crying under a table. Next year, I hope to spend this weekend back in my beloved Chicago, cooking up a storm for people I care about, so if the last few months have been pretty relentlessly miserable, I still at least have something to look forward to.

Anyway, that maudlin discursion aside, one of the neat features of the Expatriate’s Thanksgiving is that I made a different kind of meal every year, usually an ethnic/national/regional cuisine that I had never made before. I planned out a nine-course meal and generally made entirely new dishes. It involved usually about two days of cooking (and drinking), and was a blast. I hope to get back to it next year, but this year, here’s a menu I always wanted to make and never got around to:

- APPETIZER: Rastafarian Pizza Balls with Peter Tosh Butterscotch-Cannabis Sprinkles
- APPETIZER: Heydrich von Meisschner’s Alasko-Teutonic Seal & Cheddar Crackers
- SOUP: Hobo Jeff’s Boot Soup
- SALAD: Fried Beer Salad
- VEGETABLE: Asparagus-Brussels Sprout Citrus Twist ‘n’ Ham Smoothie
- SIDE DISH: Utica-Style Hot Breasts
- SIDE DISH: Pig’s Trotters with Grandmother’s Southwest Nacho Dipping Fur
- MAIN COURSE: Stuffed Wildcat a la Mode
- DESSERT: Frozen Bloody Mary with Choco-Blast Krool Whip
Tags: diary, eats

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