Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator

Voice Post: The Perils of Drunk Driving, or Getting Laffs from Sports Talk Radio

315K 1:34
“Hi there! I like to listen to sports talk radio in my car on the way to work, and the reason for that is because I like to listen to stupid people. I want to be exposed to as many of them every day as I possibly can, and sports talk radio provides that service for me. And it also heaps on additional benefits like tons of racism, and sexism, and homophobia. So it really has it all!

I was listening to it today in the car on the way into work and they played a Public Service Announcement about drunk driving, about how you should not drink and drive. And in this PSA they said that if you got into a car accident, a number of terrible things would happen to you, and they described them in gory, vivid detail: your head would fly through the windshield and be torn from your body, and your chest would be collapsed by the steering column, and your knees would be crushed by the impact.

Also, they mentioned that your feet would come out of your shoes. [Pause for dramatic emphasis.] And I thought that this was an odd thing to mention, because if your chest has been collapsed by a steering column and your head is being been torn from your body, I would not really think that losing your shoes...would be that bad. But I didn't put the thing together! I am NOT an expert on drunk driving! The people who wrote the PSA are.

So remember that, people: DO NOT DRINK AND DRIVE. Because your shoes will come off.”

Transcribed by: petit_chou
Tags: laffs, voice

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