Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator

...fa ya

As everyone knows, one of my most favoritest things in the whole wide world is being made an unwilling part of other people's racism. Hello, white privelege! Pull up a chair, let's have a yak. Anyway, a few days ago, I was tooling aimlessly around Santone, and I noticed I was "low on the petrol", as the lads say down at the chip shop on St. Swivin's Day. So I pulled into a station, gassed up the Chickwagon, and decided to go in and buy a sody pop. While in there, I noticed that they had, for no particular reason, a huge rack full of brand-new hip-hop tees of fine quality. After inquiring after their price and finding it reasonable, I picked one out -- the one, as it happens, that I am wearing right now which I think you'll agree gives this story an extra-spicy frisson -- and took it up to the counter along with my sody pop*.

Behind the counter was a young feller, perhaps in his mid-20s, who appeared to be of Arab or perhaps East Indian origin. "Ah!" thought I to myself. "One of my people, or near as dammit! Surely this will be an auspicious transaction, and not at all rife with awkward silences!" He rang up my sody pop, and, in preparation to ring up my snazzy hip-hop tee, inspected its color (light blue, with a multicolored front logo) and design.

"I like this shirt," he said, allowing me about five seconds of feeling all cool before he delivered the nuclear follow-up: "It's black, but not TOO black."

*: A Dr. Pepper, but not a Dublin Dr. Pepper. As potent a combination as is featured in that product's retro packaging and real-sugar crisp sweetness, seven bucks for a six-pack of 8-ounce bottles is pretty absurd.
Tags: diary

  • Dueling: The Interminable Continuation

    More nuggets: - Abraham Lincoln almost fought a duel once. He wrote an anonymous letter protesting Illinois tax policy, and the law's sponsor found…

  • Dueling: the Fascinating Facts

    So I'm reading this book on the history of dueling. It's called Gentlemen's Blood and is written in an amusing high-whoopsie style by historian…

  • The Death of Irony, Chapter XXXVIII

    Here is a nice passage from Sore Winners, a surprisingly thoughtful book of essays on post-9/11 culture by John Powers, a film critic and editor at…

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.