Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator
ludickid

GIVE ME MONEY

For the first time since announcing the exciting Send Leonard to CPAC initiative, we have hit what is known as a fund-raising snag. Yesterday, we raised the Fresh Princely sum of zero dollars and zero cents, moving us zero precious inches towards our goal.

Am I ready to give up? Am I read to pack it in? Am I ready to stop flogging you relentlessly about this Quixotic mission? YES! But I'm not going to. This is more than just an opportunity for me to take a vacation that I don't have to pay for; this is an opportunity for me to take a vacation that I don't have to pay for with the cream of America's crazy-person elite! I will be rubbing elbows and intellects with some of the people who make your lives miserable each and every day, and in a small way, I will be giving them some fucking payback! I will irritate them the way sand irritates an oyster, eventually causing it to barf up a pearl consisting of some amusing internet journal entries about the entire process! I refuse to believe that the 75% of you who have yet to donate to this amazing endeavor can't be shifted. What do I have to do? Wear a funny hat? I WILL DO THAT. I will do whatever it takes to get you to pony up some dough, within the confines of possibility, good taste and my own immeasurable laziness.

So cough it up! If I know you, this is something you will tell your grandkids about. And remember, there are incentives:

- crazy-mad premiums, and MORE TO COME
- I will call you from CPAC and let you listen to the calming drone of Ben Stein's voice
- for only twice the money, I will bring along a sketch artist or a photographer and it will be just like Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas only fatter

Donate today! IT COULD NOT BE SIMPLER!

Send me to CPAC!




Subscribe

  • The Party of What People?

    This will be my last entry of 2016.  Next year will begin, barring some unexpected act of fate, with the ascension to the presidency of Donald…

  • Anno Terribilis

    2016, the little year that absolutely could not, is almost over, and with the exception of people for whom it was a raging success —…

  • Shalom and the Jewish Jesus

    Shalom Auslander got the best possible start on having a sickly fatalistic sense of humor:  he was a miserable Jew from the day he was born. As…

  • Post a new comment

    Error

    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 0 comments