Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator
ludickid

More of it







#6.
DJ AAK: All right, bitch, we need to culturally assimilate.

MC BOY: HOW COME FOR YOU CALL ME A BITCH WHEN YOU ARE THE LADY AND I AM A NORTH KOREA VAGEA FREEAH

DJ AAK: I am 'reclaiming' the word. The Internet, tell him about reclaiming shit.

THE INTERNET: For so long those words were used against women. Now using them is women's attempt to reclaim them and to say, "Yes, I am difficult. I am a bitch. Call me a bitch. I'm going to reclaim bitch and make it my own word, because the word has more hostility when it's being used against me than when it's being used by me." Slut, too. Slut is just a girl with a libido, whereas a boy with a libido is just a boy.

MC BOY: THAT IS VERY ASSIMILATIONIST OF YOU

DJ AAK: Yeah, "fourth wave" all up in here.

MC BOY: ALSO I ASSUME I SHOULD NOT LOOK AT THE WORD 'DIRTY' WHERE IT IS WRITTEN ON YOUR PANTS FANNY

#7.
DJ AAK: If we are going to pass for Earthicans we should really learn more about their culture.

THE INTERNET: Anthropologists most commonly use the term "culture" to refer to the universal human capacity to classify, codify and communicate their experiences symbolically. This capacity has long been taken as a defining feature of the humans. However, primatologists have identified aspects of culture among humankind's closest relatives in the animal kingdom. As a rule, archaeologists focus on material culture (the material remains of human activity), whereas social anthropologists focus on social interactions, statuses and institutions, and cultural anthropologists focus on norms and values. This division of labor reflects the different conditions under which different anthropologists have worked, and the practical need to focus research. It does not necessarily reflect a theory of culture that conceptually distinguishes between the material, the social, and the normative, nor does it reflect three competing theories of culture.

DJ AAK: On the other hand, Hey, Paula is on.

THE INTERNET: Zoophiles tend to perceive differences between animals and human beings as less significant than others do. They often view animals as having positive traits (e.g. honesty) that humans often lack, and to feel that society's understanding of non-human sexuality is misinformed. Although some feel guilty about their feelings and view them as a problem, others do not feel a need to be constrained by traditional standards in their private relationships.

DJ AAK: Good grief, man! What the fuck are you doing with that piglet?

MC BOY: I AM "LEARNING BY DOING"

#8.
DJ AAK: Exhortation to learn the ways of humankind!

MC BOY: RESIGNED AGREEMENT

DJ AAK: Overly optimistic prediction of positive result.

MC BOY: COMICALLY MISGUIDED ATTEMPT TO ASSIMILATE

THE INTERNET: "3rd Rock from the Show" is a very funny comedy series about a group of aliens disguised as humans. John Lithgow (one of the most underrated actors of all-time) is fabulous as Dick, the confused and overly dramatic alien posing as a college professor (I think - it's been so long since I've seen this on TV!).

MC BOY: WHAT IN THE NAME OF KOOL ROCK SKI IS GOING ON WITH MY BOWEL MOVEMENTS NOW

#9.
MC BOY: WAL MART

DJ AAK: K Mart!

MC BOY: DOMINOS

DJ AAK: Papa John's!

THE INTERNET: The spoken word guarantees the existence of somebody doing the speaking; thus, it reinforces great humanist ideas, such as that there is a 'real self' that is the origin of what is being said. Derrida calls this idea of the self that has to exist to speak part of the "metaphysics of presence"; the idea of being, or presence, is central to all systems of Western philosophy. Presence is part of a binary opposition (presence/absence), in which presence is always favored over absence. Speech is associated with presence, and both are favored over writing and absence; this privileging of speech and presence is what Derrida calls logocentrism. Consider the Biblical phrase "Let there be light": the statement insures that there is a God (doing the speaking), and that God is present (because speech = presence). The present God is the origin of all things (because God creates the world by speaking), and what God creates is binary oppositions (starting with light/dark). Consider also other binary oppositions or pairs, including being/nothingness, reason/madness, word/silence, culture/nature, mind/body. Each term has meaning only in reference to the other (light is what is not dark, and vice-versa), just as, in Saussure's view, signifiers only have meaning -- or negative value -- in relation to other signifiers. These binary pairs are the "structures," or fundamental opposing ideas, that Derrida is concerned with in Western philosophy.

DJ AAK: I...

MC BOY: TOMMY HILL FIGURE

#10.
DJ AAK: The Internet, I'm worried that we're not properly blending in with the Earth culture.

THE INTERNET: blood fetishes, my little pony slash, building websites, embracing my depression...

DJ AAK: I have no idea how to dress, which language to speak or what to say when the man at the front of the bus asks me if I'm ever going to get off.

THE INTERNET: The t-dot is short for Toronto. Its slang used mainly by wiggers like Sean Desman and "gangsters". I am a wigger, so I use it, but whatever. I'm an exception because I be cool, yo.

DJ AAK: And the other one, I don't think he should be coming home with so much blood on him all the time.

THE INTERNET: America is a nation of personal responsibility where people are expected to meet their obligations. We're also a nation of fairness and compassion where those who need it most are afforded a fresh start. The act of Congress I sign today will protect those who legitimately need help, stop those who try to commit fraud, and bring greater stability and fairness to our financial system. I'm honored to join the members of Congress to sign the Bankruptcy Abuse Prevention and Consumer Protection Act.

MC BOY: HEY LOOK WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU OPEN A CAT
Tags: laffs
Subscribe

  • Tittles

    I have to haul my no-insurance-havin' ass to the dentist this morning, which I'm looking forward to about as much as I am my upcoming extradition to…

  • Ketchup

    I. The news from Fuddles, MN: Lileks refrains from scolding an immigrant clerk for her misguided patriotism and a native clerk for her failure to…

  • Lileks Watch, Vol. 4, Day 18

    Lileks today can be broken down, more or less, into sections. SECTION 1 involves the narrative of a trip to Chuck E. Cheese. He always likes to…

  • Post a new comment

    Error

    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 3 comments