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Folkutations, 1

First of all, go to schtune's LJ, and give him money to ride his bike right up Multiple Sclerosis' asshole. Or go to calamityjon's LJ, and give him money for a sketch, which he will then convert into drugstore vodka, and then borrow against his 401k to give Ben money to ride his bike right up Multiple Sclerosis' asshole. Fuck Multiple Sclerosis, is what I'm getting at here.

Second, and here I warn you that today's entries are going to be really boring and there's gonna be several of them so if you don't like it bail out now because it won't get any better, I have two musical fantasies. The first is to be a bad-ass freestyle MC; this one will never come true because while I have skillz like Bob Willz at writing the rhymes, I am wack like Shelley Hack at actually delivering them. The second is to be the singer in a fucked-up alt-country band that does unusual covers and Holy Modal Rounders-ish takes on old folk songs. This one will never come true because I don't know any like-minded musicians who would want to let me sing with them, and also because it is stupid, but nonetheless, I often find myself rewriting old folk songs with newish lyrics.

I really like doing this, because it's fun, and because it's well in the tradition of old-time folk; no matter what version of a traditional song you encounter, the odds are very good that a lot of the lyrics are "floaters" or "drifters" that have been imported from other folk songs, that the singer just dropped in there because he thought they sounded good or because he forgot the lyrics that he was going to sing. Seriously, try and find two versions of "Nine Pound Hammer" or "Shady Grove" that have the same lyrics, I dare you.

Anyway, today I'm gonna post a couple of old-time songs that I have rewritten in the last year or so. To save this from being utterly boring for you, but not really because I know no one will do it, I encourage you to do the same in comments. Also, if you are a guitar, banjo, fiddle, bass, mandolin, accordion, or autoharp player and wish to be involved in a pointless musical project in the south-central Texas area, please write via channels to etc. etc.



I got my citybilly socks in my citybilly shoes
I believe with all my heart I got the citybilly blues
Tell me, how long do I have to wait?
Or can I get you now, or must I hesitate?

I was born in Arizona, I was raised in Hell
And you’ll always hear me comin’ ‘cause I wear a little bell
Tell me, how long do I have to wait?
Or can I get you now, or must I hesitate?

I’m a clawhammer man in a clawhammer land
Playin’ clawhammer banjo with my sinister hand
Tell me, how long do I have to wait?
Or can I get you now, or must I hesitate?

You treat me like a dog, always tellin’ me lies
But you got that belly that I idolize
Tell me, how long do I have to wait?
Or can I get you now, or must I hesitate?

Now you know I ain’t a doctor and I ain’t a doctor’s son
But I got myself a dollar and I’ll have my fun
Tell me, how long do I have to wait?
Or can I get you now, or must I hesitate?

T for Texas, T for Tennessee
Tea for two with Tania, who made a fool of me
Tell me, how long do I have to wait?
Or can I get you now, or must I hesitate?

Comments

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deanarae
Sep. 12th, 2007 04:55 pm (UTC)
My musical fantasy is to be a do a female-folk-singer cover of Black Sababth's War Pigs. So far, I've got the female part nailed. Let me know if your fucked-up-alt-country career takes off. Maybe I can open for you.
ludickid
Sep. 12th, 2007 04:59 pm (UTC)
Part of my dream, and I came within a heartbeat of actually convincing a semi-well-known writer friend of mine to go along with this, is to do country covers of "Black Metal" and "In League with Satan" by Venom. I even have the arrangements all plotted out in my head.
deanarae
Sep. 12th, 2007 05:31 pm (UTC)
By the way, "is to be a do a" is top-secret code for "too much cranberry-apple wine."
ludickid
Sep. 12th, 2007 06:50 pm (UTC)
To be do be do.
( 4 SHOTS LICKED — LICK A SHOT )

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flavored with age
ludickid
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator
Ludic Log

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Leonard Pierce is a freelance writer wandering around Texas with no sleep or sense of direction. If you give him money he will write something for you. If you are nice to him he may come to your house and get drunk.

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