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The Monday Poll, Delayed

You're all going to be very sorry you asked where the weekly poll was. Just remember, it's all for science.

Poll #1081649 Dirty filthy naughty poll

When do you and your partner generally have sex?

in the morning
2(3.2%)
in the evening
26(41.3%)
in the afternoon
1(1.6%)
we vary times equally
12(19.0%)
I do not have sex, Leonard, thank you for reminding me of my painful loneliness
22(34.9%)

Your current habits aside, when do you prefer to have sex?

in the morning
10(16.1%)
in the evening
9(14.5%)
in the afternoon
15(24.2%)
I have no preference
17(27.4%)
I do not have sex, Leonard, thank you for reminding me of my painful loneliness
11(17.7%)

Consider this scenario: a couple are having sex. The male partner orgasms, but while he is undergoing refraction, he continues to engage in sexual activity (digital/oral/etc.) with his female partner. When he is once again able to attain an erection, they have vaginal intercourse again until he orgasms. They then repeat the process a third time. How many times have they had sex?

Once
19(30.2%)
Three times
11(17.5%)
I object to the question because it is heteronormative
1(1.6%)
I object to the question because it poses the male experience as definitive to the question of whether or not sex has begun or ended
8(12.7%)
I object to the question because of its inelegant construction
2(3.2%)
I object to the question on moral grounds
1(1.6%)
I object to the question for some other reason, delineated below
1(1.6%)
I do not understand the question
1(1.6%)

What is the most number of times in one day you have had sex, defined as sexual activity involving a partner but not otherwise restricted?

1-3
12(19.4%)
4-6
27(43.5%)
7-9
11(17.7%)
10+
4(6.5%)
I have never had sex
1(1.6%)
Allow me to semantically muddle this issue in Comments
0(0.0%)
Your sudden obsession with my sexual habits is totally creeping me out, Leonard
7(11.3%)

Defend your choice of preferred time for sex. Or tell me a bad joke. Whatever.

Comments

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archaica
Nov. 2nd, 2007 03:32 pm (UTC)
The whole "how many times" question - from the time clothes go off till the time clothes go on is how long a single episode of "having sex" goes on.

UNLESS:

1) There is a period of sleep in between.
2) You're one of those dirty hippies who walks around with no clothes on anyway.
ludickid
Nov. 2nd, 2007 03:58 pm (UTC)
You know, this reminds me that I also wanted to include a question of what counts as sex in the poll, but I forgot. Ah well, there's still plenty of time in the future to horrify my friends and make myself depressed.
BLANK - archaica - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:00 pm (UTC) - Expand
BLANK - petit_chou - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:03 pm (UTC) - Expand
BLANK - ludickid - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:05 pm (UTC) - Expand
BLANK - archaica - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:06 pm (UTC) - Expand
BLANK - petit_chou - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:13 pm (UTC) - Expand
BLANK - archaica - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:15 pm (UTC) - Expand
BLANK - slammerkinbabe - Nov. 4th, 2007 04:34 am (UTC) - Expand
petit_chou
Nov. 2nd, 2007 03:48 pm (UTC)
I talked about this with my friend Erica. We both think the answer is "three." Interestingly, we both followed it up with the same caveat. "If the guy stuck it in and they went at it for a while but he didn't come, THAT WOULD STILL COUNT AS ONE." So theoretically if there were THREE instances of the lady having an orgasm but the dude just...uh...being some sort of Tantric freak, that'd still count as three.

We honestly have NO real rationale for this. Unlike my defense for morning sex. That is rock solid.
archaica
Nov. 2nd, 2007 03:57 pm (UTC)
So, "instances of sexxing" = "orgasms had"?
petit_chou
Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:02 pm (UTC)
Not even necessarily. If I had sex with a dude and it was somehow botched -- we were doin it and a roommate walked in or the phone wrang or the only condom broke or whatever -- before anyone got off, I'd still consider it an instance of sexxing.

However. I *will* say that, though I consider it terrible and heterosexual of me, I DO tend to consider "instances of sex" to include penises in vaginas (for hetero couples). If me and my dude engage in some oral fun times but nothing else, I do not consider that having sex. That's gettin dirty and having fun, but it is not The Sex.
BLANK - archaica - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:07 pm (UTC) - Expand
BLANK - ludickid - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:12 pm (UTC) - Expand
BLANK - archaica - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:14 pm (UTC) - Expand
BLANK - petit_chou - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:23 pm (UTC) - Expand
BLANK - ludickid - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:28 pm (UTC) - Expand
BLANK - calamityjon - Nov. 2nd, 2007 05:59 pm (UTC) - Expand
BLANK - roseyv - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:36 pm (UTC) - Expand
BLANK - ludickid - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:39 pm (UTC) - Expand
BLANK - vito_excalibur - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:20 pm (UTC) - Expand
West Coast Represent! - petit_chou - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:22 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: West Coast Represent! - vito_excalibur - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:28 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: West Coast Represent! - archaica - Nov. 2nd, 2007 05:47 pm (UTC) - Expand
BLANK - tamisevens - Nov. 2nd, 2007 08:20 pm (UTC) - Expand
BLANK - yuriverse - Nov. 2nd, 2007 08:36 pm (UTC) - Expand
ludickid
Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:02 pm (UTC)
PAINFUL LONELINESS CLUB 4 LIFE
I don't think a real rationale can be made, but I'm fascinated that the difference in the "once" and the "three times" answers is so narrow.

To avoid the self-deprecating answer I gave, I prefer (thought it's been ages since I had it) morning sex. Because:

(a) layteez are at their most lovely when they just wake up.
(b) as littlewashu sez, it's a great way to start the day.
(c) you're both RIGHT THERE, you know? Why not have sex?

Boy, those Folger's commercials were the best, though, huh?
petit_chou
Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:05 pm (UTC)
Re: PAINFUL LONELINESS CLUB 4 LIFE
It has been ages since I've had it as well, Leonard. Unfortunately, I learned this summer that having a boyfriend, does not necessarily equal having sex.
Re: PAINFUL LONELINESS CLUB 4 LIFE - ludickid - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:08 pm (UTC) - Expand
Not for lack of trying on my part - petit_chou - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:13 pm (UTC) - Expand
BLANK - archaica - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:16 pm (UTC) - Expand
Trying, VERY TRYING - ludickid - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:19 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: Trying, VERY TRYING - archaica - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:21 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: Trying, VERY TRYING - ludickid - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:36 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: Trying, VERY TRYING - calamityjon - Nov. 2nd, 2007 06:00 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: Trying, VERY TRYING - ludickid - Nov. 2nd, 2007 06:21 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: PAINFUL LONELINESS CLUB 4 LIFE - tamisevens - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:19 pm (UTC) - Expand
Push your WHAT behind your WHAT? - ludickid - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:30 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: Push your WHAT behind your WHAT? - tamisevens - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:36 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: PAINFUL LONELINESS CLUB 4 LIFE - vito_excalibur - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:22 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: PAINFUL LONELINESS CLUB 4 LIFE - roseyv - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:40 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: PAINFUL LONELINESS CLUB 4 LIFE - ludickid - Nov. 2nd, 2007 04:43 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: PAINFUL LONELINESS CLUB 4 LIFE - roseyv - Nov. 2nd, 2007 07:05 pm (UTC) - Expand
calamityjon
Nov. 2nd, 2007 05:14 pm (UTC)
Oh good, you've managed to marry sex and pedantry. However can I thank you? Perhaps a crowbar to the face?
ludickid
Nov. 2nd, 2007 05:28 pm (UTC)
I RESPOND IN THREES
1. Dude, you've known me how long? Was there ever even remotely a chance that I would not be pedantic about sex?

2. Clearly, I am not alone, so set your crowbar for industrial use.

3. You just wished a happy birthday to your car.
calamityjon
Nov. 2nd, 2007 05:32 pm (UTC)
Re: I RESPOND IN THREES
1. I wonder, do you count each of the discussions above as a new thread of pedantry, or is it one long pedantic bzzzzh bzzzh CROWBAR IN MY FACE

2. I'm sure she'll understand when I say: Mostly it's you and Petit Chou, and she already knows I kind of want to hit her in the face with a crowbar now and again.

3. Does it count as a new birthday wish for my car every time I wish it a happy birthday or is it one long pednatic BZZZZH BZZZZH CROWBAR IN MY FACE
mckennl
Nov. 2nd, 2007 05:49 pm (UTC)
There was a couple sitting in front of me at Weight Watchers last night and they were both pretty overweight but cheerful as all hell and holding hands and she had that post-fuck hairdo where it's all teased in the back in a certain way and it made me very happy.

So there are at least two people in Maryland who would choose "right before our Weight Watchers meeting."

But again, that's why I pick night -- I don't really want to go out with that hairdo and I don't like taking more showers than necessary.
calamityjon
Nov. 2nd, 2007 06:02 pm (UTC)
They were cutting off a few extraneous calories before the weigh-in! Good on 'em!
BLANK - ludickid - Nov. 2nd, 2007 06:24 pm (UTC) - Expand
BLANK - calamityjon - Nov. 2nd, 2007 07:13 pm (UTC) - Expand
kudaspeaks
Nov. 2nd, 2007 06:05 pm (UTC)
Bill O'Reilly told me not to talk to the bad electronic man
Quit phishing, you internet predator! I'ma call Chris Hansen on your ass!
ludickid
Nov. 2nd, 2007 06:25 pm (UTC)
Re: Bill O'Reilly told me not to talk to the bad electronic man
By "sex", I mean "your Social Security number".
gillen
Nov. 3rd, 2007 01:19 am (UTC)
The number of times question is like asking how many times someone who took public transport and used multiple transfers to get to his destination took the bus. He took the bus once. That enterprise may have involved boarding and deboarding several times and periods between standing about not on a bus, but it was all part of a single journey.
( 60 SHOTS LICKED — LICK A SHOT )

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ludickid
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator
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PROPRIETOR

Leonard Pierce is a freelance writer wandering around Texas with no sleep or sense of direction. If you give him money he will write something for you. If you are nice to him he may come to your house and get drunk.

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