Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator

All I Want For Christmas

I still have my buck-ass two front teeth, and Grand Theft Auto IV won’t be coming out until next year, so I’m willing to settle for a good night’s sleep. However, if you’re feeling generous:

- Bottles are always accepted. Thanks to an upswing in my alcoholism and a downturn in my liquor-buying habits, my home bar is direly understocked, with a mere dozen or so bottles. This leaves me reliant on old faithfuls like the martini, the Scotch and water, and the TNT, and a diverse liquor cabinet, like a diverse society, is a sign of social health.

- Uma Thurman. Note that I am not one of these fly-by-night youth fetishists who abandons his true celebrity love once a younger, hipper model rounds the corner. Uma was my imaginary girlfriend in 1988, and she will be my imaginary girlfriend in 2008.

- Comic books are always accepted, no matter how crappy.

- I realize that my suggestion that you buy me gifts is fairly ridiculous, especially since, thanks to my new office-sharing arrangement, I hardly ever post here anymore, and when I do, it’s not funny or interesting (although, let’s be honest, that’s hardly a new development). However, should you want to tack on another year or so paid subscription to this rattletrap LiveJournal, I would love you more than I love candied yams.

- I am also still raising funds for my big trip to CPAC (the Conservative Political Action Conference) this coming February in Washington, DC. There, both on my own and as a designee of Sadly, No!, I will mock right-wingers, report in the doings of wingnuts and wingnut-enablers, get my hands on lots of kook literature, have breakfast with several presidential candidates, and do my best to personally enrage Michelle Malkin. And you can help this happen by sending a couple of bucks via PayPal to leonard dot pierce at gmail dot com. It will be like giving your mind a cleansing blowjob.

And what do YOU want for Christmas, little boy/girl/self-selected gender category?

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