?

Log in

No account? Create an account

JUMP BACK | BE FORWARD

Acquisitions (Unexpected)

So let me tell you about the greatest thing that has happened since Monday.

My boss (who, as bosses go, is generally pretty great) drew my name in our office Christmas party 'Secret Santa' gift exchange. And she got me -- well, she got me an iTunes gift card, which is fine. A very fine gift, I have nary a complaint about it. But she also got me something else.

She got me...

...a PIMP CUP.

A monogrammed pimp cup.

A monogrammed, homemade pimp cup.

FOR CHRISTMAS!

I don't care who you are or what you're doing: you did not, and will not, receive a more awesome gift than this for the holidays this year. You may get something you really, really like, but YOUR BOSS DID NOT GIVE YOU A HAND-CRAFTED PIMP CUP WITH YOUR INITIALS ON IT for Christmas, and that means you are not as cool as me. I mean, for Crissakes, it says BIG PIMPIN' on the side! IN GLITTER! Did your boss get you something that says BIG PIMPIN' on the side in glitter? No! He or she did not! And on the base, also in the blinged-out, thugged-up medium of hobby shop glitter, it says SPENDIN' THE Gs! I mean, come on. I dare you to deny the sheer magnificence of this gift. PIMP CUP!

Also, another of my co-workers gave me a bottle of Bombay Sapphire, so I had a pimp cup and a bottle of my favorite booze sitting in front of me at my desk for half the day. It was pretty hard to concentrate on getting any work done.

In other unexpected acquisition news, I find myself, through an unusual concatenation of events, in possession of two guitars. Unfortunately, I have managed to arrive at this point in my life without ever having developed the ability to play the guitar at all, so I'm not sure exactly what I'm supposed to do with them. The upside is that they appear to be kinda crappy guitars, so at least I won't be letting a couple of good guitars go to waste.

Comments

( 25 SHOTS LICKED — LICK A SHOT )
manningkrull
Dec. 20th, 2007 02:23 pm (UTC)
Haha, oh man, the stuff about the pimp cup made me laff and laff. That really is an amazing present.
ludickid
Dec. 20th, 2007 02:26 pm (UTC)
Man, and the more amazing thing is, she made it like, YESTERDAY! She and I are both cursed with insomnia these days, but while I just sit around watching TV and wishing I could sleep, SHE MAKES PIMP CUPS FOR HER SUBORDINATES! That's someone who will go to her grave knowing she did right in this world.
archaica
Dec. 20th, 2007 02:39 pm (UTC)
that present is pretty fucking awesome. My pimp cup is just a plastic CVS cup; in my defense, it does say (in Sharpie) "Big Papa" on the side.
ludickid
Dec. 20th, 2007 02:53 pm (UTC)
If you drink from a plastic pimp cup, you will die.
archaica
Dec. 20th, 2007 03:01 pm (UTC)
Captain Atom speaks the truth....

(Come to think of it, the one time I actually drank from that pimp cup was the most destructively drunk I've ever been ... clearly there's something to that)
thespus
Dec. 20th, 2007 03:26 pm (UTC)
Which is exactly what happened in Last Crusade. He chose poorly.
beanparty
Dec. 20th, 2007 03:27 pm (UTC)
Wow, I dont even know what a pimp cup is, and I'm impressed.
ludickid
Dec. 20th, 2007 03:34 pm (UTC)
It's a blinged-up chalice, basically. Made popular by ridiculous crunk-rapper Li'l' Jon.
beanparty
Dec. 20th, 2007 03:41 pm (UTC)
oh, I thought maybe it was for collecting your pimp monies in.
roninspoon
Dec. 20th, 2007 03:30 pm (UTC)
I suggest you use the pimp cup as evidence to your office area cohabitant as proof that you are better liked, and thus deserve the ability to blog to your internets at work, despite how much they may disapprove.

I further suggest that you use one of the guitars in a whimsical costume, or wear it strapped across your back to the office like Lou Diamond Phillips did in La Bamba.
ludickid
Dec. 20th, 2007 03:34 pm (UTC)
Those are both fine ideas, sir.
littlewashu
Dec. 20th, 2007 03:55 pm (UTC)
You win Christmas! Or maybe your boss does.
ludickid
Dec. 20th, 2007 04:03 pm (UTC)
I am merely the recipient. She wins Christmas, possibly in perpetuity.
calamityjon
Dec. 20th, 2007 05:10 pm (UTC)
Man, I feel cheated, last year Kate and I were gonna make you a pimp cup for Christmas. (I couldn't find a satisfactory starter cup, also I got bored with the ideas or forgot it or something. Anyway, SHARKED)
littlewashu
Dec. 20th, 2007 07:52 pm (UTC)
Neat! Well, it's the thought that counts.

This entry had me thinking of how I could have a party where everyone had pimp cups. But that would probably have to be a "Pimps and Hos" party which is completely played-out and lame. So I'm still thinking.
kudaspeaks
Dec. 20th, 2007 08:06 pm (UTC)
Pimps and Their Hedge Fund Managers?
ludickid
Dec. 20th, 2007 08:15 pm (UTC)
Pimps and their constantly-under-sedation tailors.
calamityjon
Dec. 20th, 2007 08:13 pm (UTC)
You could have a 2Girls1Cup party You're right, I have no better idea.
littlewashu
Dec. 20th, 2007 08:24 pm (UTC)
I really need an "ew!" icon
What's a hell nuh? I didn't get your joke so I googled it and EW! I will not be watching that video. Also you are gross, I can't believe that we are friends.
calamityjon
Dec. 21st, 2007 03:38 am (UTC)
Re: I really need an "ew!" icon
We are? I should probably send you a Christmas gift or something, huh?
thebitterguy
Dec. 20th, 2007 04:43 pm (UTC)
Man. My boss gave me a gingerbread cookie.
janehex
Dec. 20th, 2007 05:31 pm (UTC)
Your boss sure is crafty.

Is there any way this chalice can be fashioned into some kind of pendant that one would wear on a gold chain, perhaps?
vito_excalibur
Dec. 20th, 2007 10:45 pm (UTC)
Wow. Your boss wins at life, and you win the Boss Sweepstakes.
roseyv
Dec. 20th, 2007 11:51 pm (UTC)
YOu know, if she had put some mayonnaise in that, she'd a really had something there.
moondispatches
Dec. 21st, 2007 12:02 am (UTC)
That is the best pimp cup ever. That pimp cup makes other pimp cups look like tacky goblets.
( 25 SHOTS LICKED — LICK A SHOT )

Profile

flavored with age
ludickid
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator
Ludic Log

PROPRIETOR

Leonard Pierce is a freelance writer wandering around Texas with no sleep or sense of direction. If you give him money he will write something for you. If you are nice to him he may come to your house and get drunk.

Latest Month

December 2016
S M T W T F S
    123
45678910
11121314151617
18192021222324
25262728293031
Powered by LiveJournal.com
Designed by Tiffany Chow