Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator
ludickid

Leonard's Tax Tips For Freelancers

LEONARD'S BRILLIANT SCHEME TO LESSEN TAX BURDEN #1: Thoroughly and conscientiously set aside the proper amount of taxes, Social Security and 401(k) set-asides from every single freelance paycheck
SCHEME DEPENDENT ON: Being thorough and conscientious; 401(k) plan not deflating like kid's balloon due to market crash and flying around room making raspberry noise as money leaks out
SUCCESS OF SCHEME EXPRESSED AS A PERCENTAGE: 35%

LEONARD'S BRILLIANT SCHEME TO LESSEN TAX BURDEN #2: Deduct as many things as legally possible and large number of things not legally, or in any other way, possible
SCHEME DEPENDENT ON: Ability to save receipts; ethical standards of tax preparer
SUCCESS OF SCHEME EXPRESSED AS A PERCENTAGE: 45%

LEONARD'S BRILLIANT SCHEME TO LESSEN TAX BURDEN #3: Fail to report income on grounds that freelance clients did not send you necessary tax documents
SCHEME DEPENDENT ON: Freelance clients neglecting to send tax docmuents
SUCCESS OF SCHEME EXPRESSED AS A PERCENTAGE: 0%

LEONARD'S BRILLIANT SCHEME TO LESSEN TAX BURDEN #4: Hope that world comes to an end/Powerball ticket pays off prior to April 15th
SCHEME DEPENDENT ON: Proper selection of 'lucky' numbers/life-hating insanity of world leaders
SUCCESS OF SCHEME EXPRESSED AS A PERCENTAGE: TBD

LEONARD'S BRILLIANT SCHEME TO LESSEN TAX BURDEN #5: Idiotic president of home country decides to hand out ridiculous, wasteful, useless tax 'refund' instead of actually doing something to help the economy
SCHEME DEPENDENT ON: Lame duck president with 'legacy' issues and fanatical devotion to ultra-right Norquistian economic policies
SUCCESS OF SCHEME EXPRESSED AS A PERCENTAGE: 100%

SPECIAL BONUS TV TRIVIA QUIZ HAVING NOTHING TO DO WITH ABOVE TAX TIPS:

On "NewsRadio", what was Dave Nelson's stage name when he was a competitive knife thrower?

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