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JUMP BACK | BE FORWARD

by Leonard Pierce, age 6

Boy, when someone tells you to _______________________________, they're not kidding!

(a) avoid buying weed from out-of-work drywallers you meet at the bus stop
(b) be careful with the .50-caliber hunting rifle
(c) go easy on the phenyl-cyclohexylpiperidine
(d) not listen to Metal Machine Music in its entirety
(e) observe all warnings about the electrified third rail
(f) step off, you punk-ass bitch
(g) put that thing back in your pants immediately
(h) keep metal objects out of the microwave
(i) make sure you separate whites and bright colors
(j) have one more for the road
(k) pay no attention to the people who call you an alcoholic failure

ENDUT

Comments

( 4 SHOTS LICKED — LICK A SHOT )
calamityjon
Feb. 4th, 2008 05:08 pm (UTC)
"Endut" is what you get when you come to the last in a long line of Inuits.
hipsterdetritus
Feb. 4th, 2008 06:35 pm (UTC)
And then you go outut?
schtune
Feb. 4th, 2008 08:14 pm (UTC)
I had one similar to MMM, but mine was a warning against Growing up in Public.
yuriverse
Feb. 4th, 2008 08:21 pm (UTC)
Awww, I remember the first time a friend gave me his extra copy of MMM - that was how we bonded; anyone with two copies had to be worthy. Anyway, he lived in DC, me in Boston. I got home and was playing it Real Loud, when the phone rang. It was this friend.

"I just wanted to make sure you hadn't been driven to suicide while playing Metal Machine," he said.
"Nah," said I, "I'm on side six right now and having a great time!"
"Side ... six."
"Yeah! Love it so much I played it through once and right into a second listen!"

Such MMM marathons are a rare occurrence, and usually involve some sort of chemical stimulant(s), but they do happen about once a half-decade.
( 4 SHOTS LICKED — LICK A SHOT )

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PROPRIETOR

Leonard Pierce is a freelance writer wandering around Texas with no sleep or sense of direction. If you give him money he will write something for you. If you are nice to him he may come to your house and get drunk.

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