Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator

The Sum Total Of Everything I Have Learned In Life

by Leonard Pierce, age 6

Boy, when someone tells you to _______________________________, they're not kidding!

(a) avoid buying weed from out-of-work drywallers you meet at the bus stop
(b) be careful with the .50-caliber hunting rifle
(c) go easy on the phenyl-cyclohexylpiperidine
(d) not listen to Metal Machine Music in its entirety
(e) observe all warnings about the electrified third rail
(f) step off, you punk-ass bitch
(g) put that thing back in your pants immediately
(h) keep metal objects out of the microwave
(i) make sure you separate whites and bright colors
(j) have one more for the road
(k) pay no attention to the people who call you an alcoholic failure


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