Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator
ludickid

All Apologies

Recently, the Australian Prime Minister Kevin Rudd issued a formal apology on behalf of his government for the past systematic mistreatment of the native population.

Getting into the spirit of things, except with his head completely up his ass, right-wing pundit Glenn "Professor Poopypants" Reynolds has suggested that Barack Obama should apologize* for an anti-Semitic flier circulated by a black** minister in Tennessee with no known connection to Obama whatsoever.

To continue this glorious tradition, as an Arab-American, I would like to apologize for the following:

- The sudden proliferation of felafel.

- Casey Kasem.

- That funny smell in the back of cabs.

- Islam.

- The way that Arabs keep confusing Christians by pointing out that not all Arabs are Muslims.

- Whining about Guantanamo Bay.

- Oh, fine, 9/11. Happy now, you crybabies?

I urge you all to join myself and Sadly, No! in apologizing for things that have been done by people who have some vague religious, ethnic, national, racial or cultural connection with you. For example, I am eager for one of you to take the lead on the Rob Liefeld issue.


*: The Jewish target of the flier, incidentally, has endorsed Obama for president.

**: "What one Christian does is his own responsibility, what one Jew does is thrown back at all Jews." (Anne Frank)
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  • The Party of What People?

    This will be my last entry of 2016.  Next year will begin, barring some unexpected act of fate, with the ascension to the presidency of Donald…

  • Anno Terribilis

    2016, the little year that absolutely could not, is almost over, and with the exception of people for whom it was a raging success —…

  • Shalom and the Jewish Jesus

    Shalom Auslander got the best possible start on having a sickly fatalistic sense of humor:  he was a miserable Jew from the day he was born. As…