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JUMP BACK | BE FORWARD

"Baby, making love to you is the best three minutes of my week."

"Can you imagine if we had a daughter, and she was as hot as you? I'd have trouble keeping my hands off her."

"I'm so glad I have you to talk to about all the things that aren't interesting enough to go on my blog."

"You're not just my wife; you're my best friend. With a vagina."

"Sometimes I wish someone would really hurt you so I could kill them."

"You make love like a really skillful hooker."

"I don't deserve a woman as good as you. I deserve a trampy loser like your hot friend Jeanette."

"You look really good in that dress. It was your mom's, right?"

"The day I met you was the happiest day of my life. Way better than our wedding, or the day our stupid kids were born."

"Baby, you're so fine, I barely even need internet porn anymore."

Comments

( 9 SHOTS LICKED — LICK A SHOT )
twirlingtulip
Jun. 16th, 2008 08:58 pm (UTC)
pshaw!
I know you're just cheating off the flight of the conchords manual.
ludickid
Jun. 17th, 2008 12:11 am (UTC)
Jemaine stole my haircut, that's all I know.
(Deleted comment)
ludickid
Jun. 17th, 2008 12:12 am (UTC)
Why everybody callin' me a biter today?
roninspoon
Jun. 16th, 2008 11:05 pm (UTC)
Man, just when did it become a social crime to tell the truth?
ludickid
Jun. 17th, 2008 12:12 am (UTC)
No part of this post should be construed as truth.
roninspoon
Jun. 17th, 2008 02:31 am (UTC)
But wait, that means... am I? Wow man.
thaitea
Jun. 17th, 2008 03:15 am (UTC)
Are you sure this isn't from Cosmo?
ludickid
Jun. 17th, 2008 04:07 am (UTC)
No, that would be "I love you so much that I'm taking time away from my busy schedule of carefully planning rapes to take you to dinner."
bisonfish
Jun. 17th, 2008 07:10 am (UTC)
"Lady, when I is gettin' jiggy with the fox next, door, it's yoh name I is shoutin' out"

Reminds me of one of my favourite film lines:

'Mrs. E! Until you learn to take your teeth out I'll not up your wages'
( 9 SHOTS LICKED — LICK A SHOT )

Profile

flavored with age
ludickid
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator
Ludic Log

PROPRIETOR

Leonard Pierce is a freelance writer wandering around Texas with no sleep or sense of direction. If you give him money he will write something for you. If you are nice to him he may come to your house and get drunk.

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