Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator (ludickid) wrote,
Gun-totin', Chronic-smokin' Hearse Initiator
ludickid

You think they give a damn about their polls in Russia?

And now, what made America great: Monday polls.

Poll #1219232 Patriotic Hangover Poll

America!

Fuck yeah
7(11.1%)
I want to live in
4(6.3%)
Everywhere around the world, they're coming to
11(17.5%)
loves the minstrel show
4(6.3%)
God shed His grace on thee
0(0.0%)
I spell it with three Ks
3(4.8%)
I'm proud to be from there, where at least I know I'm free
0(0.0%)
I wish its women would stay away from me
1(1.6%)
I really hate that "Horse with No Name" song
7(11.1%)
I can't believe it picked that jackass David Cook
3(4.8%)
home of the Whopper
9(14.3%)
I could be one of your kids
2(3.2%)
she's so cute on that "Ugly Betty" show
10(15.9%)
love it or leave it
0(0.0%)
as a non-American, your cultural references baffle me
2(3.2%)

Which of my five favorite things about America is your favorite?

unrestricted travel
4(6.2%)
the presumption of innocence
5(7.8%)
the Constitution, generally
6(9.4%)
the Bill of Rights, specifically
23(35.9%)
the fact that ours is a nation built not on an ethnos, or a geographical location, or a common language, or even a culture, but an idea
26(40.6%)

Nothing is more essential to the American character than:

the automobile
8(12.5%)
the firearm
4(6.2%)
the entertainment industry
10(15.6%)
the military/industrial complex
7(10.9%)
the systematic abuse of the Negro
2(3.1%)
the apple pie
1(1.6%)
the insistence that everyone else speak English
4(6.2%)
the unrestricted growth of capitalism
11(17.2%)
the word "dude"
13(20.3%)
other (see Comments)
4(6.2%)

Why am I so bad at chess?

You lack experience.
4(6.6%)
You are impatient and impulsive.
7(11.5%)
You do not think strategically.
4(6.6%)
You are stupid.
0(0.0%)
Wait, what does this have to do with the 4th of July?
18(29.5%)

Suggest an alternate national anthem for the United States of America.

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