no more student loans, whoooo!
seeing if the hobo lifestyle is all that my great-grand-dad says it was
I can quit pretending I know the difference between a pinot noir and a pinot grigio
soup kitchens, because I love soup
finding out which of my kids I really love the most as I sell them into white slavery one by one
claiming that getting thrown out of my shitty apartment is a "moral victory"
laughing bitterly at the monthly arrival of my 401k statement
watching CEOs of huge financial services firms get multimillion-dollar bonuses for thinking up great solutions to the problems they caused
boiling up a shoelace and telling my kids what the internet was
choosing from a rich pallette of suicide options
the hearty laughter of Islamist terrorists, echoing warmly from inside a cave
regaling my buddies in the uranium mine about my old job as a day trader
gloating, because I'm a Canadian or something
Hooverville: The Reality Show
thinking about how America just kept on electing Republicans