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Owes Nap!

I was reading this when I realized: despite my undying love of one-percenter jokes, I am at heart a 13-year-old, because I love snaps. Lines like "he was so fat he had triabetes" are capable of reducing me to helpless laughter.

Therefore, I command thee: signify! Throw your best snaps in the comments. Seriously, I want like 200 responses to this post. I know you can pull this off, as your mom said to me last night.

Comments

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lester22
Oct. 1st, 2008 12:52 pm (UTC)
Your mom is so fat, she uses diet soap.

Also, for the Arab in you: Eyreh be afass seder emmak.
ludickid
Oct. 1st, 2008 03:58 pm (UTC)
You're so cheap, you asked for change of an I.O.U.
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nverzeanu
Oct. 1st, 2008 12:53 pm (UTC)
tardis twat
ludickid
Oct. 1st, 2008 04:01 pm (UTC)
You're so drunk, your gin blossoms won a gardening competition.
(Deleted comment)
ludickid
Oct. 1st, 2008 03:59 pm (UTC)
Her booty so big, when she spins around, people try to find New Zealand.
oxfordhacker
Oct. 1st, 2008 01:38 pm (UTC)
Watching "Two girls, one cup" just made your mama hungry.
ludickid
Oct. 1st, 2008 04:02 pm (UTC)
Your mom eats so much, air is on a waiting list to get in her mouth.
oxfordhacker
Oct. 1st, 2008 01:43 pm (UTC)
Your mom is the site of three separate geocaches.
oxfordhacker
Oct. 1st, 2008 03:33 pm (UTC)
No-one calls you 'motherfucker' because it's too unkind.
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perich
Oct. 1st, 2008 01:44 pm (UTC)
Yo momma so cheap, she recycles farts.
ludickid
Oct. 1st, 2008 04:05 pm (UTC)
Your mom is so dumb she invested her whole savings in food stamps.
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clockworkmonkey
Oct. 1st, 2008 01:45 pm (UTC)
Your momma's butt is so big it even makes relaxed fit look nervous.
ludickid
Oct. 1st, 2008 04:06 pm (UTC)
Your mom's ass is so fat they don't let her in the planetarium no more because the kids get confused.
clockworkmonkey
Oct. 1st, 2008 01:51 pm (UTC)
snappy!
Your mother's hair is of such a greasy nature that environmental enthusiasts have been asking her if they could occasionally relieve her of some of the excess, as they have converted their automobiles to run on filtered cooking oil and are always looking for additional sources of fuel.
ludickid
Oct. 1st, 2008 04:06 pm (UTC)
Re: snappy!
Your mom is so dull paint watches her dry.
manningkrull
Oct. 1st, 2008 02:54 pm (UTC)
Your mother is so fat that it has become a serious health problem for her and her doctor is very concerned about it.

(Ben! Go! Now!)
ludickid
Oct. 1st, 2008 05:44 pm (UTC)
Your girlfriend is so French that kids in the neighborhood call it "Marjorie kissing".
memento_mori
Oct. 1st, 2008 03:05 pm (UTC)
Your mother has a drinking problem and is probably sleeping with someone other than her husband.
ludickid
Oct. 1st, 2008 05:49 pm (UTC)
Your mom got more crack than Humpty Dumpty.
oilyrags
Oct. 1st, 2008 03:05 pm (UTC)
Your mama only eats the righteous food. If it's right there, she just eats it.
oilyrags
Oct. 1st, 2008 03:10 pm (UTC)
Plus I saw her on youtube whuppin Kimbo Slice's ass.
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calamityjon
Oct. 1st, 2008 03:06 pm (UTC)
My favorite one I got from Manning, and it goes along the lines of "You're so cheap, if they gave ferry rides for a nickel, you'd run alongside the riverbank yelling 'Damn, that's a good price!'"
calamityjon
Oct. 1st, 2008 03:12 pm (UTC)
Oh yeah, and there's that one from Achewood, "Your momma's so crass, she smokes a cigar and eats shrimp cocktail on the bus!"
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roninspoon
Oct. 1st, 2008 03:20 pm (UTC)
You momma so fat, when she walks backwards, she beeps.
roninspoon
Oct. 1st, 2008 03:21 pm (UTC)
You're so cheap, that if you sat on a lump of coal, in a week it would be a diamond.
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hipsterdetritus
Oct. 1st, 2008 03:26 pm (UTC)
Your momma's so fat, her maxi pads have a sleep number.
ludickid
Oct. 1st, 2008 07:59 pm (UTC)
Your moms is so dumb, she saw a sign that said "HOSPITAL - LEFT", so she went home.
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krinndnz
Oct. 1st, 2008 04:42 pm (UTC)
You're so short, Spike Lee uses you for a nightstand.
ludickid
Oct. 1st, 2008 07:59 pm (UTC)
You so stank you make statues hold their nose.
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( 133 SHOTS LICKED — LICK A SHOT )