"Bush to Reveal Truth About Iraq Weapons"
MAN, WE SURE BLEW THAT PLACE UP GOOD
"DOHA, Qatar - President Bush defended the U.S.-led invasion of Iraq on Thursday and pledged that 'we'll reveal the truth' on Saddam Hussein's weapons of mass destruction. He surveyed Baghdad from Air Force One as he flew back to Washington."
ME BIG AND MANLY
"'We've made sure Iraq is not going to serve as an arsenal for terrorist groups,' Bush said in a speech at Camp As Sayliyah, Qatar, his coat off and shirt sleeves rolled up as he spoke to a sea of tan camouflage-clad U.S. soldiers manning the command center for the Iraq war."
DISCOVERY IS PROOF, EVEN IF IT ISN'T
"Bush noted the recent discovery in northern Iraq of what U.S. intelligence agencies say are probably each part of a mobile biological weapons production facility. No complete production system has been found. Neither trailer had any biological agent inside, nor showed any signs that they had been used to produce biological weapons."
JUST LIKE WASN'T HAPPENING BEFORE
"'We're on the look. We'll reveal the truth,' Bush said, without specifically promising weapons would be found. 'But one thing is certain: no terrorist network will gain weapons of mass destruction from the Iraqi regime because the Iraqi regime is no more.'
I mean, admit it, folks: it takes a lot of stones to shoot a guy and then tell the world that now that he's dead, he won't be producing any more child pornography, because you shot him.